Number 100
Alastor: Why is your back scratched up?
Anthony: *flashes back to when he chased a racoon after Alastor told him not to*
Anthony: I'm having an affair.
Number 101
Alastor: Anthony darling, are you okay, you're zoning out.
Anthony: If I put a milkshake in one yard and cracked open a cold one in another yard, where would the boys go?
Alastor: Anthony, I-
Anthony, grabbing Alastor by the shoulders and shaking him: wHeRe WoUlD tHe BoYs Go?!!
Number 102
Anthony to Alastor: Hold the fuck up.
Anthony: I'm the fuck up.
Anthony: Hold me.
Number 103
[Alastor and Anthony skipping stones on a lake]
Alastor: It's such a beautiful evening.
Anthony: *whispering* Take that you fucking lake.
Number 104
Cherri: *Sees Alastor and Anthony walk into the room holding hands* So who finally confessed?
Anthony: It was me, I made sure it was short and sweet.
Alastor: You yelled 'Listen here little shit, I have feelings for you and it's about time you acknowledge them!' from the roof.
Anthony: It worked though.
Number 105
Anthony: Is it gay to fantasize about being in a loving relationship with your best friend of twelve years?
Audrick: Of course it is, what-
Molly, covering Audrick's mouth: Absolutely not.
Number 106
Alastor: *gets 8 hours of sleep MINIMUM each night* I am so awake and ready for the day the sun is beautiful and I'm so happy to be alive.
Anthony: I've had 30 minutes of sleep for the past five days and now I can smell sounds please kill me.
Number 107
Alastor: I'm home!
Anthony: Welcome back! Do you want lunch, or me~?
Alastor: I'll have lunch.
Anthony: *mumbles angrily*
Number 108
Alastor: Guess who.
Anthony: It's either my boyfriend, or the cold clammy hand of death.
Alastor: It's your boyfriend.
Anthony: Dammit
Number 109
Alastor: My favorite college experience is when I had a class at seven in the morning and someone next to me literally poured a monster energy drink into his coffee, said "I'm going to die." And drank the whole thing.
Anthony: That was me.
(Source: slightly tweaked version of a post made by tumblr user korrakun)
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Hazbin Hotel Oneshots, Headcanons, and incorrect quotes.
FanfictionMostly radiodust, I will admit. thanks to @AngelTeaofFanfic for this idea, and yeah. That's it
