Joshifer Fanfiction - A Different Love

Chapter 25

Day 4

Josh's POV

"Jen?"

No. This can't be happening. As the light peeks through, I see this scene hazily.

"Alex." Jen snaps, pushing this 'Alex' off of her. But I could see them, their bodies close, she didn't refuse to their actions.

"Jen?" I call again, because it's the only word I can say that stops my pain.

When she doesn't call my name back, I feel my knees go weak, my jaw stinging at the memory of Nick's fist connecting with it.

"Sorry-" I stutter, wobbling. I feel light-headed, like I'm drunk. But I'm sober, and all of this is happening.

"Josh, why are you here?" Jen asks quietly.

"I...missed you. I thought about giving up on the week thing. It's stupid. All of it. I wanted a break from you, not to lose you." I buried my face in my hands.

"I know. But Alex-"

"Don't try explain, Jen, I don't know how many men you've done...this with over the week, but I-" I tried to get out the words 'we're over', but I knew I could never let her go. I try to look through the darkness to see the man who sits there, silent. I find Jen's eyes, but they're not looking at me, they're looking at him.

I walk out with no futher explanation, my heart is breaking, over and over. This is a cycle, and I am in the middle, watching Jen shatter my love into pieces, only to put it back together with one touch. I know I broke her heart a couple times...but, never intentionally, pulled into drunk kisses in the night. The way she looked at him, the way they were kissing when I walked in, the tears hit me faster than I've ever felt. Emotions. The emotions of life, not just in love...happiness, sadness, jealousy, distraught, free..

I'm out of the door crying before I even know what's happening. But I should've known. Her voice stops me. Her voice.

"Josh Hutcherson."

I close my eyes and freeze right there, beside my car. I hear her footsteps nearing, and I can't force myself to turn around.

There's a silence, as if she expects me to drive away, when I don't, I feel a hand touch my shoulder.

"I don't know what to say." She speaks quietly.

"Do you love him?" I snap, still turned away from her.

There's a pause, and I feel my heart beating quicker by the second.

"I think I always have. I think I always w-"

"Please don't say that. Please don't." I say croakily.

"Why did you stop me then?" I turn around, finally looking her in the eyes, just to make this much more painful.

"Because I didn't want to let you go." She bit her lip.

"So this has been your plan from the beginning, huh? To use me but never truly love me, and meanwhile you were telling yourself I was the bad one?" I continue speaking pointless words, like how I truly loved her, how I regret every mistake I did, and how in the end it was always her I loved no matter what.

But it didn't matter what I said now, Alex came walking out the door and stopped by Jen's side.

"Dude, listen, I never meant to..." He trailed, looking at Jen and I.

"You didn't know." I shrugged, then glared at Jen.

"Look, you can't blame me for love!" She said, tears welling in her eyes.