Joshifer Fanfiction - A Different Love

Chapter 34

We didn't kiss for long, because Josh started sobbing again so I wrapped my arms around him for a while. Every few minutes he would pull me in for a kiss and I wouldn't object, mostly because I wanted it. I wanted him back. It was stupid, I know, but when the person you've always loved finally tries to change, for better, you can't help giving in.

"Do you want to go home?" I asked him, and he looked up, nodding.

I got off his lap and sat in the passenger seat as he started the car and we started driving home. Not to my house. But to his.

The drive was slow, but eventually we pulled up. I took Josh's hand and we went inside.

I closed the door and we stood there for a moment in silence. I looked around, expecting Josh to wander off to bed, but he took me in his arms in one slick motion and kissed me passionately. We shuffled to the bedroom, where he gently pulled me on the bed.

"Wait." I stopped his lips.

"What?" He asked.

"Does this mean I forgive you?" I said, confused.

He laughed quietly and shrugged, pressing his lips back onto mine.

As he slowly undressed, I knew that Josh was the one all along. That we unraveled each other. That even if things seemed hard, they were never nearly as complicated as they seemed when we were together.

He completed me.

Why couldn't I see it? Why couldn't I go with it all this time?

"What are you thinking about?" Josh said, smiling slightly, our lips close.

I snap out of my daze and smile too, wrapping my arms around him.

"You." I admitted.

"Typical." Josh grinned, and I rolled my eyes.

"Just kiss me." I whispered.

"It would be my pleasure." He whispered back.

*

I opened my eyes the next morning. I felt no guilt, no headache, no heartache and no confusion. I only felt Josh's arms around me, holding me tightly.

I shifted slightly so I was facing him. He was fast asleep, messy hair and a quiet snore. A blanket was covering us with a bunch of pillows scattered. I heard light rain falling outside, and moved in closer to Josh to keep warm.

I could just see the alarm clock beside the bed that read '12:30pm'. I wasn't surprised. It felt good to sleep in after a while. Especially since Alex had a habit of waking me up early-

Alex!

Oh god. What would I tell him? I didn't call him or text him and didn't go back home last night. He must have been worried. I'm about to reach for my phone when I realise that Alex, of all people, could guess what I had done.

He knew.

I sighed. I would feel less guilty if Alex hadn't confessed he was falling for me before I left.

It's almost impossible to decide how I feel of Alex in Josh's arms, comfortable and happy after a perfect night. Would he understand that there was always this chance? That I would be waking up with Josh and not him?

I close my eyes and try to fall back into the world of sleep, but of course, I can't. I lay there for a while just watching Josh carefully, noticing his features. It had been a while since I got this close of a look at him. I notice a bit of facial hair growing, and the bags under his eyes obvious. He must have had a few sleepless nights.

The more I look at him, the more memories float back. Some good, some bad. I wish I could forget about the reasons I stopped being with him, but it's hard. When I can't stand this thinking anymore, I lean in and kiss him awake.

His eyes snap open. Strange. He used to be much more calm when I did that. Things really have changed.

His eyes finally find me and he smiles slightly.

"Hey." He yawns.

"Hey." I smile.

"Thanks for last night." He said.

"No. Thank you." I lent in for another kiss, but he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into a hug instead. I was confused, but didn't question this. I embraced him.

"Want some breakfast?" He pulled away.

"More like lunch." I laughed.

He looked over at the clock and buried his face in his hands.

"Crap. Is that really the time?" He ran his hand through his hair, laughing.

"Good sleep?" I asked.

"Of course. It was with you, after all." He shrugged, then got up and dressed.

"Pancakes." Josh clapped his hands together and went off to the kitchen.

I got dressed in the clothes I wore last night to the 'dinner'. At home I would be wearing pajamas by now, but unfortunately I don't have any of my clothes here.

I joined Josh in the lounge room where he holds pancakes and coffees.

I rushed to the couch and we begin to eat.

"Delicious." I said with my mouth full.

"Always." Josh replied, laughing.

"I miss this." Josh tells me half-way through eating.

"Miss what?" I sipped my coffee.

"This... Waking up late. Pancakes. Coffee. TV. You."

I let the silence overtake us.

"Do you want it back?" Josh questioned.

"That would require a very...complicated answer." I sighed.

"It doesn't have to be so complicated, Jen." He smiled slightly.

"I don't want to give up Alex." I admitted, standing up suddenly. I felt very defensive for some reason.

"Oh. Right. That guy." Josh rolled his eyes.

"He's not just 'that guy', I've known him for a long time. And he has helped me get roles in movies and move on in life." I snapped.

"Oh, so now you care about that stuff?" Josh raised an eyebrow, laughing.

"It is my job." I countered.

"It's our job. I help you with auditions. You help me with auditions. He can't do much compared to me." Josh boasted, and I tried not to run out of the house. I wanted to sort this out.

Josh seemed to notice the anger growing, and tried to fix it. He grabbed my hand and pulled me down next to him.

"Hey. I'm sorry. I won't be such a jerk anymore. If you promise to stay, that is." He pushed hair out of my face, and planted a kiss on my forehead. I could tell he was trying hard.

"You're such an asshole." I said, but I was laughing. And eventually so was he.

"I know." He shrugged.

"I'm sorry...I just need some time to figure out what to do with Alex. And then..." I trailed.

"Then it'll be back to our different love?" Josh suggested, grinning.

I smiled, giving him the answer.

In a second, his lips were on mine.

***

Wow, sorry. It's a short update! But I'm pretty busy x

Thanks for waiting guys! xo