Soldier Of Pain (Bucky Barns Fanfiction) [COMPLETED STORY]

Chapter 8 - The last hope

A/N: I apologies for this chapter being SUPER late, I've been really busy with the start of School and stuff, and just a bunch of personal shit as well. But I will try my very best to post a chapter every weekend.

I'm really sorry about this. But I tend to write really angsty and depressing shit, so if you don't like that kind of stuff I recommend you leave now or forever hold your peace.

Triger Warning: Greif, and lots of talk about drath! Self harm and Suicide attempt!

If you can't handle that sort of stuff, don't read it.

ENJOY READING! =)

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I wake up with a loud scream, my voice box probably broken now. Sweat glistens over my body. I pull my knees closer to my chest and hold my hands to my face as the tears begin to flow like a waterfall. My head throbbing and spinning, my heart beating out of my chest. I rock back and forth in a hyperventilating state. "They're dead. They're dead. They're dead." I repeat over and over and over again.

I flinch and scramble to the corner of the room at the sound of the door barging open. "Hey, Y/n, Doll, it's okay. It's okay. It's alright. I'm here now. It was just a dream. It's not real." A voice speaks, but I can barely hear the words, they're just a muffled mess in my ears. The person tries to place their hand to my shoulder to comfort me (or attck me) but I swat it away and crawl further into the corner, still repeating the same words. "They're dead. They're dead. They're dead."

"It's me, Y/n, it's Bucky. I won't hurt you," He says. "It's just a dream. It's not real," He repeats. "You're right here. I'm here, Doll. Just breath."

I lift my face from my hands to look at him, my vision is blurry. "They're dead. They're dead. They're dead."

His eyes brake when he sees my face. "Nobodies dead, Y/n. You're safe with me here. I would never let anything happen to you, Doll."

"NO!" I shout. Shocking him. "They're dead! They're dead because of you!" I recognize him. Solder 1.

"Get away from me!" I scream at him. "Get away—" My voice breaks, unable to talk due to my lack of proper breathing.

He instantly backs away. A single tear rolls down his face. "Try to remember Doll. Please tell me you remember," He whispers to me.

"Go away. Go away. Go away," I repeat again and again and again.

Just then another three more people come running into the room and I hide myself in a ball again. "Go away. Go away. Go away."

A girl I recognize with glowing red hands holds her fingers in front of my face and flicks them. Calming me down using her magic.

Suddenly I am back to reality. I am calmer now. My heart rate and breathing finally returning to normal and my head stops throbbing and spinning.

I burry my head in my hands again, only this time out of embarrassment.

Usually I can semi-control myself after any nightmare, since I am so used to it by now. But never this particular nightmare. The worst one.

I look around at everyone, my vision still slightly blurry.

Bucky shifts uncomfortably in his spot where he had collapsed to the floor, his back pressed to the wall. "Can I- can I please have a moment alone with Y/n," He speaks before anyone can say anything else, his voice sounding very broken. "No." I bluntly answer, surprising everyone.

"Thank you Wanda," I tell her after a moment of silence, as I stand up to leave the room.

I push past the still shocked Clint and Steve and run out the room and down the hall. I have no idea where I'm going, but I don't care.