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𝙳𝙰𝚈 𝟻 𝚁𝙴𝙲𝙾𝚅𝙴𝚁𝚈 𝙾𝙵 𝙼𝚈 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝙽𝙶𝙴𝚁 𝚅𝙴𝚁𝚂𝙸𝙾𝙽 — two ||THIS IS HOME — CAVETOWN|| tw: depression , homophobia , abuse , daddy issues
A/n: please don't read if you get triggered by the mention of any of the topics. Thank You & enjoy.
|| FLASHBACK ||
❝WHY CAN YOU DO ANYTHING RIGHT!? FOR ONCE IN YOUR FUCKING LIFE?❞. That was the sound of your father after you finally opened yourself up to him. You were only 14 at the time. You were still a kid, and because of that he thought that you were just 'confused'. It felt cold. Everything felt cold. There is supposed to be warmth in a home, a place you can go to when you need to rest and get comfort. Well, that's at least what every teacher fucking tells you. You looked down to your feet. Your leg bounced up and down, your feet felt cold even if you were wearing warm mitch-match socks. The moment felt cold. Your mind froze for that whole moment. The yells from your father began to get blurry as you felt like the world was spinning around. It's like your hearing faded a bit. "Can't believe a fag is under this household. No wonder your mom left"
'Ouch. That one hurt'
"For fuck sake look at me when I'm talking to you!" The older male yelled before roughly grabbing her chin and forcing you look up. You didn't dare to cry. Not in front of him. "You can stop sinning or YOU CAN GET THE HELL OUT OF THIS HOUSE!" He yelled before he let go of your chin and slapping you across the face. Making you fall to the floor, leaving a red handprint on your left cheek. Your e/c began to swell with tears, with the bit of power you had left, you made sure no tears fell. Maybe he was right. In a way he was right. Right? "I-I'm S-SORRY!" You choked trying to calm down your breathing. "YOU SHOULD BE. MARRIAGE IS BETWEEN FEMALES AND MALES! YOUR DISGUSTING, A DISAPPOINTMENT. You're not part of this family until you stop."
You finally got back up. "I DIDN'T CHOOSE TO BE THIS WAY! I-I'm sorry! IT'S WHO I AM. I CANT FIX- I can't change it" You tried to reason. You were tired at that moment, tired and cold. This wasn't your home. It was just a house that you came to every day after school. It's not like school was any better, but it was more tolerable. You wanted to die but the thought of killing yourself scared you. You didn't want it to hurt but you weren't scared of harming yourself. Only killing. "DON'T START WITH THAT BULLSHIT. YOU DO HAVE A CHOICE AND YOU'RE CHOOSING TO SIN! It's truly disgusting. Your mother wouldn't approve." You're heart felt like it crumbled into millions of pieces.
"YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO TALK ABOUT HER! THE SHIT YOU DID TO HER. EVERYTHING YOU DID TO HER WAS YOUR FAULT. YOU'RE A DRUNK! That's all you'll ever be... I hate you. I HATE YOU! I FUCKING HATE YOU! LEAVE ME ALONE. I wanna cry." You argued back at him, he was surprised. His eyes widened. He wanted to believe you but his self-confidence told him, no. That it was wrong. That you were wrong. That something was wrong with you. He always knew there was something off about you when you were younger. And now that he knows, he regrets not noticing earlier. Probably because he was drunk for your whole childhood. "What did you say?.." He asked, it was most came out as a whisper.
"I SAID I JUST WANNA CRY!" You yelled before storming out of the room.
It still felt cold.
♥♡♥♡♥♡♥
"Brahms," You said randomly, the masked male looked over at you. Comfortable on your bed, looking up at the ceiling, enjoying each other company. "Yes?" He asked in curiosity to what you had to say. "Do you ever feel like... I dunno. Different? Because of the gender(s) we like?" You asked him, he was taken back to your question but didn't hesitate to answer. "I use to but I felt better about it when I first saw you" He answered truthfully. You smiled. Warmth vibrated off of him. It was like his happiness was contagious. How could someone make you so happy without trying? The thought of Brahms made you just want to smile. "Thank you"
"For what?"
"For making realize it's okay, to be me"
It felt warm again. Like it was when your mother was still around.
