Just benefits?

Nine*

Any chapter with a * indicates some kinda smut, so there will be spicey stuff in this chapter, enjoy y'all!!

The next three days are all basically the same. I wake up in a cold and empty bed after falling asleep in Clay's arms. We all eat breakfast together while Clay and I send subtle looks to each other the whole time.

We hang out for a bit before one or both of them go off to join someone elses' or do their own stream leaving me alone for a bit. Well, usually I'm not alone, Clay mostly has me sit in his recording room with him while he does his stuff so i'm not completely on my own.

That is something that I really appreciate, but I'm not completely sure if he knows that or not. Even if I can't talk I would much rather be in his room with him just being there than by myself trapped away in my own room. My anxiety sometimes makes me feel alone but ever since I have been here, I haven't felt that way at all.

After that we eat dinner together and then hang out some more by watching a movie or tv or playing a game or something, anything that we can all spend time doing together. It truly all is very nice. The boys and my dynamic all fit in very well together making everything work really well.

Right now I lay on Clay's bed, waiting for him to finish on someone's stream, I'm not even sure whose it is. My brother went to bed ages ago so now I just wait here, lying on my back on his bed engulfed by his smell. As strange as it sounds his scent really calms me
.
I don't exactly know what Clay and I are just yet though, it really is a strange concept. We kiss a lot when no one is around and  I fall asleep in his arms every night but we havent put any labels on anything yet and I'm okay with that. Something about him makes me feel like its ok to not have a label or anything like that.

He makes me feel safe. And that is a dangerous thing to me. I don't want my heart to be in the open, I don't want to wear my heart on my sleeve but with him everything is out in the open. He has full access to my heart and it scares me.

I know Clay isn't anything like my last ex but he really left a scar on my heart that I know I need to work through but again, I'm scared. I'm scared to trust again.

The sound of the door opening and closing snaps me out of my thoughts and I turn to see Clay standing there with a silly little grin on his face and Patches in his arms. "Awww" I cooed at them.

He continues to play with patches before putting her down and coming to cuddle up with me on the bed. I smile and nuzzle into him a little, making him chuckle and kiss me shortly after.

Something that I have noticed about Clay is that he pours all of his emotions into his kisses, his kiss is always filled with pure passion. Something ive only ever gotten from him.

In little time, our kisses go from soft and passionate to rough and hungry as they often do this late at night. I break away from our kiss and look him in his beautiful eyes. "I Think I'm ready tonight."

His face lights up with shock and lust. "Are you sure? We truly don't have to do anything I promise." I kiss him again for only a second before pulling away again. "I am absolutely sure Clay." He smiles and kisses me again but that only lasts for just a moment before he travels down my jawline to my neck.

He leaves soft yet hungry kisses all the way down my neck to my collar bone before reaching the breast line of my shirt. Then he looks up at me, silently asking if I really am okay with this and I am, so I nod for him to continue.

He grabs the hem of my shirt and carefully helps me out of it before attacking my still covered chest with his mouth. He relentlessly sucks, bites and kisses all along my cleavage, leaving as many marks as he can before he reaches my bra.

I help him as he delicately takes that off and throws it with my shirt, leaving me in just my shorts and fuzzy socks. He goes back into devouring my boobs, bringing one of his hands up to play with one of my nipples while his tongue works the other.

Soft sighs escape my mouth as he does his work. Slowly his hand moves from my breast to the hem of my shorts, lingering for only a moment before he slips his hand under both layers, rubbing circles around my clit.

I gasp out and arch into his touch, another large sigh escaping at the pleasureful contact. "You're so wet for me but I've barely even touched you yet." He teases, bringing his lips up to mine so they just barely touch as he speaks. He continues to circle incredibly slow around my clit as I bring my head up making our lips touch properly.

He kisses me with everything he has and I do the same, trying not to moan at the sensation he is causing. He breaks away from the kiss and lowers himself on the bed and removes both layers that protect myself from being completely bare to him.

"You're so beautiful." He mumbles out before placing himself between my legs. He removes him fingers from my clit and instantly replaces it with his tongue. He flicks me with his tongue causing my body to involuntarily jerk, but he pulls me right back onto his face.

Clay continues to go at my clit with his mouth, the only noises being my soft moans echoing off the walls. Then I feel one of his fingers poke my entrance, slowly dragging into me. My back arches off the bed and I place my hand over my mouth to hold back the loud moan I know was about to escape.

With no warning his other hand snaps up and grabs the hand that was placed on my mouth and pins it beside me. "No, I want to hear how pretty you sound for me." He growls out from his space between my legs.

He starts to move his finger in and out of me while his tongue still works my clit. With my hand pinned beside me I have no choice but to moan out loudly and freely. Thank God this room is soundproof. 

He continues to pump his finger, eventually adding a second one while his mouth still works at my most sensitive parts, making me go absolutely crazy. His fingers really do work wonders holy shit.

After only just a few minutes i feel myself becoming close to cumming. "C-Clay I'm.." suddenly his fingers start working extra fast and he starts to suck on my clit, sending me over the edge. Once I finish he uses his tongue to clean me up then comes up to kiss me.

"Damn, I guess being a gamer really does have its perks, huh?" I tiredly say, causing him to laugh. "Come on baby, let's get you to sleep." I only nod and barely help him as he tries to get me dressed back into the shorts and the hoodie.

We get comfortable in a cuddling position and with a kiss on the forehead i fall asleep