the one that got away | seongjoong (✓)

• XII •

"w-what a-are you doing h-here?"

"i could ask you the same... this is my cafe."

"y-you own this place?"

"i do... do you want to come inside? it's warmer in there..."

"i-i shouldn't... y-yunho's probably—"

"i already texted yunho and told him i saw you out here and i was going to check on you."

"h-how'd you k-know to d-do that?"

"i know he's one of your backup dancers. i assumed that means you guys are still really close."

hongjoong nodded.

"we are."

"come inside... please? i'll make you your drink."

"i-i don't want to b-be a bother... i-i'm okay..."

"joong... you're not okay. i can see it in your eyes."

"i'm fine, seonghwa. please, i'll be okay..."

"i'm not taking no for an answer. you look upset and i know that when you're upset you start to shut down. your drink has always helped to comfort you, so please just let me make you one to help you out a bit?"

"fine..."

the two walked inside, hongjoong's heart beating faster than he would've liked to admit. he had missed seonghwa more than words could describe, so much that he subconsciously began to rub his tattoo again.

"sit down wherever you'd like, i'll come to you."

hongjoong nodded and went to the table he'd sat at last time, then seonghwa walked back behind the counter and started to make hongjoong's drink. the younger placed his arms on the table, resting his head on top of them and sighing as he stared outside. tears flooded his eyes again and he tried hard not to make it obvious, embarrassed from already having cried in front of seonghwa before.

seonghwa still noticed though, frowning as he finished up making the drink, then went over to the bakery display and picked up something small for hongjoong to eat as well.

"here," he said softly, sitting across from the younger.

hongjoong sniffled and wiped his eyes, then looked at the treats in front of him with bright eyes.

"thank you, seonghwa..."

"of course..."

hongjoong ate in silence, sipping his drink every so often. seonghwa just smiled when he saw how much hongjoong was enjoying everything, then went to get up, assuming the boy would want to be left alone.

"w-where are you going?"

"i didn't know if you'd want me here..."

"i-i do... i-i— hwa?"

"yeah?"

"i-i'm sorry... for everything."

"you were forgiven long ago, joong. i'm sorry too... neither of us deserved such a rough break up when we were already dealing with so much."

"i'm sorry... i-i'm so, so s-sorry..." hongjoong cried.

"hongjoong... hey, c'mere," seonghwa cooed, putting his arms out to give the younger a hug.

hongjoong surprisingly stumbled over, hugging onto seonghwa tightly as he cried. the older began to rub hongjoong's back gently, using all of the same tactics that he had once used years ago.

it didn't take long for hongjoong to calm down in the arms of the boy he loved so dearly. when he had, he just snuggled into the feeling he had missed so greatly of seonghwa's arms around him and sighed, the older pausing from running his fingers through hongjoong's hair to make sure he was alright.

"i-i'm o-okay..."

"joong..."

"fine... i-i'm not. t-things haven't been very good lately..."

"i noticed..."

"h-how?"

"you came in here pretty regularly and all of a sudden you just stopped one day. i knew that meant that you were either too busy with schedules or that your depression was really taking over again."

hongjoong just nodded, sighing a bit.

"come to my office... it'll be comfier there."

"o-okay..."

hongjoong allowed seonghwa to take his hand and lead him to his office, where the two then sat down, hongjoong in seonghwa's office chair with the boy's jacket draped over him as a blanket. hongjoong spun around in the chair, causing a smile on seonghwa's face.

"i missed you," seonghwa said softly.

"i-i missed you too."

"you've been rubbing your wrist since you got here... is that your tattoo?"

hongjoong nodded slightly, showing his wrist to the older. seonghwa smiled a bit, then pulled down his sock to reveal his own tattoo.

"y-you didn't get it removed?"

"no... i'd never."

"but san told me—"

"he was wrong. it tends to stay hidden, but i'd never get rid of it. it's too special to me."

"i-it is?"

"do you remember the last thing you said to me five years ago?"

"um... n-no... not really."

"you said 'i hope you make all your dreams come true. fighting, hwa.' that's stuck with me since that day and whenever i start to feel discouraged, i look at my tattoo and think of your words."

hongjoong looked at seonghwa with bright eyes, his heart skipping a beat. he couldn't believe that seonghwa had thought about him so much.

"hongjoong... i know it's been a really long time, but i want you to know that if things are hard, you can always lean on me."

"i-i don't want to be a burden..." he whispered, looking down.

"you could never be a burden to me. you never have been and never will be."

"i-i've changed, you know... only a little, but i still have."

"really?"

"i-i don't know how to explain it... um... i-i haven't told anyone, not even yunho or mingi... i-i've been having these p-panic attacks? i-i can't leave my house by myself without feeling like someone's watching me a-and sometimes it makes me panic..."

"joong..."

"i-i don't know w-what to do, hwa..."

"it's okay to not know, that's okay. has anything else changed?"

"my anxiety's gotten a bit worse... i-i know how to manage myself for the most part, though."

"that's also okay, hongjoong. it's not like i'm going to run away from getting close again."

hongjoong hugged himself a bit before he looked at seonghwa again, nervously staring into the older's eyes as he spoke.

"d-do you want to?"

"want to what?"

"get close."

"yeah... i do."

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and so they've met again <3 lots of fun stuff coming from here on out!!