His tattoos - Minsung-

Weak

The numbness slowly faded. The ground came back underneath his feet. His mind got pulled out of its current state. Finally his eyes widened, realizing what he had done. Minhos loud voice let his body finally react.

He had been scared, and all he had done was push Minho away.

Instead of feeling relieved a suffocating feeling crept over his body.

Will he leave now?

But Minho was still standing still right in front of him, analyzing his expressions. He looked like he was waiting, like he was expecting Jisung to answer.

Jisungs chest rose up and down fast, breathing got harder and harder every second.

Minho was quick to realize that. "Lets sit down outside Jisung, come on." He grabbed Jisungs arm, pulling him outside on the balcony, sitting down on the lounge.

The cold air filled his lungs again, finally it felt easier to breathe. While he was thinking about something he pulled out his cigarettes again, lighting one.

"I hate you smoking but I have to admit, it is hot." Minho chuckled, hoping to cheer up the moment. To weaken the harsh tension. Jisungs stiff body loosened up a little.

"I am now only doing it when i'm stressed." A weak smile formed on his lips. He felt exhausted from his own mind.

Minho pointed to his lap. Jisung tilted his head in confusion. Minho pointed down again. "Rest your head in my lap, i'll try to calm you down. Then you tell me what is going on in that pretty head of yours."

Jisung complied, laying down. Now he stared up at the face of his lover. He was still not over the fact that Minho was that pretty. His heart jumped out of his chest again. You would think he got used to everything, but he didn't.

He felt Minhos fingers slowly run through his hair, brushing it out of his face gently. A simple gesture. But it made Jisung calm down a lot, with a deep breath his body now completely loose.

"I'm sorry Minho." He brought out. His voice breaking at the end. He felt terrible.

Minho nodded, his attention fully focused on Jisung. "It's okay." He continued letting his fingers massage Jisungs scalp.

"I realized something yesterday. And it made me think. Like a lot more than I should. I told you a bit about my anxiety, but not a lot. You deserve the truth. I am weak Minho."

"And what is wrong with that? You don't have to be strong all the time."

Jisung felt like tearing up.

"Yes I do Minho. I can't be all crybaby when i'm with you."

Minho sighed.

"Jisung. I am not with you because I only want to have perfect times. I am with you because I love you and I want to commit to you. Which means I am by your side in good times and in bad times. I won't feel less in love just because you are sad or overthinking or angry or whatever it might be. Don't you understand that? I am not perfect either, I also get sad and I make mistakes."

He waited for an answer, but he didn't get one.

"That is what a relationship should look like you know? Arguments, crying together, screaming at each other. But at the end of the day we will still cuddle up in the same bed and be okay. Because we will talk it out, we will tell each other about our problems. If you are not up for communication I am not able to be in a relationship with you."

"I also want our relationship to be based on communication." Jisung whispered.

"Good. Then communicate with me. Don't close off. Don't leave me hanging when you feel bad. Tell me about it and i'll try to make you feel better if I can or let you cry into my chest if I can't."

The dark sky surrounded them. A few little stars already covering the sky. The streetlights finally lit up, brightening up the area around them. The balcony itself had no light on it. Luckily they didn't take off their jackets yet or else they would've been freezing.

"I'll try to be a better boyfriend from now on."

Silence.

"We are together?"

Jisung didn't know whether he should feel hurt or laugh at the situation.

"Yes? I don't just say I love you and have sex with anybody you know?" He chuckled.

"But Sung you never asked me. I didn't want to just assume it without hearing your thoughts about it too." Minho looked deeply into Jisungs eyes, meeting the familiar warmth.

"Well now you know baby." Jisung reached out his hand to Minhos neck, pulling him down close to leave a sweet peck on his lips. He felt Minho smiling against the kiss, and grinned too. Finally he felt good again.

Maybe Minho is right. Maybe talking isn't that bad.

"Can I ask you something though Jisung?" Minhos voice was quiet, shy.

Jisung looked up into his eyes.

"What did you realize yesterday?"

Jisung knew that the question was coming. And he knew the answer. He had wanted to keep it a secret, to not tell Minho. He had been scared of rejection. But Minhos sweet words made him feel more secure, more safe with their bond. He knew he could trust him.

"Alright i'll tell you."

Another moment of silence, the wind slowly howling. Again small snowflakes fell down from the sky, but not enough to settle down. Nobody was screaming around, there was no loud music or cars honking, just comfortable quietness.

"I think you are my soulmate Minho." He used Minhos name whenever he was very serious about something, which made Minho blush furiously.

"Like your soulmate soulmate?" Minho brought his hands up to his cheeks, trying to hide them.

Jisung held up his pinky. The one which had all the red lines wrapping around his finger deeply drawn into it. Minhos eyes widened.

The story he told me about, about finding his soulmate.

Is he my soulmate?

Yes. Yes he is.

He looked at his own pinky.

"Lets go inside again, i'm cold." Jisung stood up, a bit too fast. His head was spinning and he had to stay still for a second to let his body calm down.

"Yeah, i'm hungry."

After eating some leftovers they had found in the fridge they finally went into Jisungs room, both tired and drained out from emotions. Instead of proceeding with talking they layed down, ready to sleep. Time didn't matter.

And then they did exactly what Minho had said before. They cuddled up, Minho comfortably resting his head on Jisungs shoulder, burrying his face into his neck. Every now and then Jisung left another kiss on Minho, either his forehead, his hair or his temples.

He made sure Minho was asleep before he closed his eyes, letting himself fall into a deep slumber too.