Is this what you wanted? | Book 1 in the Wanted series

baby?

Kalani

''thanks'' I whisper. I lean from over the toilet and grab the warm rag from sage.

It's been 4 weeks since Silas's death. We couldn't have a proper burial because they fucking said bullshit about not being able to find his fucking body or whatever.

3 WEEKS AGO

''What the fuck do u mean you cannot find his body? you mean there's nothing? ANYTHING!'' I scream, holding my head. I can't fucking sleep, eat or think.

what was life even without him here? what am I supposed to fucking do??

Sage grabs my shoulders and hugs me as I shake uncontrollably with sobs. How am I supposed to fucking grieve correctly for someone I never got the fucking time to spend with?

''Those we truly love never leave us. There are some things death cannot touch mi amore" she smiles up at me. " He may not be here with us physically, body found or not but I promise you.. he is here. Life goes on. live through it. He holds a special place in your heart that no one else has earned or will ever take, please believe me. The things you loved and cherished about him, are the things that are going to hold memory in your heart forever. I know he misses you. and I damn sure miss him too.'' Sage says through tears.

I cry harder into her arms and clutch her shirt.

''come on let's go home''

home.

Now I'm sitting in the bathroom throwing my guts up while Sage comes and helps me.

"Hey.. You've been sick a lot.. and you've been eating way too much. I know it's not my place to ask this, but before Silas.. " She says uncomfortably, " Did guys ever uh- have sex? " She questions.

I look at her and laugh, " Yeah but.. I was on birth control " She shakes her her and gets up. She grabs a white rag and warms with with hot water, " Did u maybe skip that day? Look I just want to be safe. Maybe you should take a pregnancy test "

Pregnancy test? What? There's no way that I'm fucking pregnant. I mean how- there's just no way. I didn't skip.

" No. I'm fine Sage. " I say sternly.

She looks as if she's about to say something but goes against it, " Alright well I have school so I'll see u later. Feel better " I nod and say my goodbyes as she leaves.

Pshhh.

Pregnant? I cant get pregnant. There's no way.

I'm not pregnant.

4 hours later.

Holy shit.

I'm fucking pregnant.

shit shit shit.

What the fuck am I going to do??

I cant fucking raise a baby.

God why am I crying now.

Silas and me never talked about a baby.

I don't think I can do this. How can I raise this baby, knowing he's the father and he's not fucking here? "

HOW?

I put down the test and grab my phone and call my friends on 4 way, " Guys.. I need u too come over "

1 hour later

" OMG IM GOING TO BE A AUNT?? HOLY SHIT "

" IM GOING TO BE A GODMOTHER "

" A FUCKING MOTHER?? "

They all yell at the same time. I could f even say anything. I sat down on the chair and started to cry.

I feel them come and sit down next to me, " I cant fucking raise this baby. I wouldn't know how. I don't have experience with kids. I'm 23 for fucks sake. How am I suppose- Hes not here. He's not here with me. Or his fucking unborn baby. I'm here alone. I just can't guys " I sob. I cant do this mother thing by myself.

" You're not alone. You have us chica bonita " Harlow smiles at me wiping her tears.

" We love you. He may not be here but we are. We have  eachother. We will raise this beautiful baby into one. I promise when the baby gets older they will know his or hers daddy. And will love every fucking story you tell him or her. " Aviva says.

" I love you guys so much "

" We love u too " they touch my belly and I laugh with tears forming.

" Your child will be so pretty "

Yes.

Yes they will.

And they will have a great fucking memory of their father.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door.. I look at everyone with a. Confused face. Who could that be???

I walk over and open and I see Sage breathing hard with blood on her face, " Someone is after us. And we need to fucking leave NOW! "

THE END

LMFAO just kidding.

But this book is over BYE LMFAO