The Cate Blanchett Case {Cate Blanchett}

12~The Trash

"Is this really a good idea?" I asked Cate as we pulled up to this cute looking diner, that seemed to be quite busy. Cate still had her hands on the wheel, as if the question I'd asked her had frozen her.

Eventually she sighed and then shrugged, "I mean, who the hell cares?" She said, but I could tell from her weak tone that she did, in fact, care.

"I-I'm not trying to bring you down, I just wouldn't want anymore rumours, that's all," I offered, it was the closest to comforting I could give her.

I think she knew what I was saying was true, I could tell from the way she swiftly glanced outside at the busy tables inside. From the way she took her lip between her teeth and chewed relentlessly, from the way her fingers drummed on the leather of the wheel.

On her left hand, might I add, sat a golden ring with a huge diamond. It lay on her ring finger, a claim to her once prosperous marriage? No, maybe not, maybe a message to the public to say that she still loved her husband, to diffuse any possible rumours. I liked her tactics.

"What if I want the rumours to be true?" She spoke suddenly, stopping all the fidgeting and turning to face me, her blue eyes searching deep within mine. What for? I had no idea.

Her question caught me off guard, did that mean the rumours were true and that what she'd meant to tell me yesterday had been the true story? If that was the case, why was she taking me out in public where we certainly couldn't talk about things like her divorce? This lunch didn't benefit either of us, or did it and did I just not realise?

So many questions. I hated the fact that I still had no answers.

"I don't know what you mean by that, Cate," I admitted, watching her wearily, waiting for tears or at least an irritated sigh that showed she was upset.

However, what I got was different to anything I'd seen over the few days I'd spoken to her.

Cate slumped, she leant forward, towards me as if she was going to hug me. Instead of touching me she just flopped over as if the invisible weight she'd been carrying had finally won and broke her.

That's when I heard the sob, a shaking, heart-aching, broken sob. It shook me into a silent shock of sorts, what the hell was happening?

Suddenly, I wasn't totally clueless on what to do anymore. I was angry, irritated and it was so powerful, so raw, so emotional  and new that I didn't even realise it at first until words that I hadn't meticulously thought out, words that came from raw passion and emotion just left my mouth.

"Cate Blanchett, I don't want to seem rude and hell I know this is not my place, but get a hold of yourself!" Cate recoiled like I'd slapped her in the face, her back straightened and her sobs quieted down just so she could hear what I said.

She didn't say a word, she just stared at me. Her eyes not blank but full of complete shock at what I'd said, as if she couldn't believe these informal words had left my mouth. I couldn't quite believe it either but now I'd started, I wasn't about to stop.

"Yes, you are in a shitty situation. Yes, it will be shitty for you but only if you let it. You need to stop moping around and putting on the whole woe is me act, yes, I understand this is hard you and Andrew were very in love," I faltered as she winced, as if the very mention of Andrew physically hurt her.

Unfortunately, for her, I wasn't quite done.

"I remember you telling me that things change, for better or for worse. I've not made my mind up about you yet but let me tell you one thing," I said, pointing my finger in her face, she watched me. Not taking her eyes off of me as if what I was saying was revolutionary.

It better had be or I'd never get this damn story without her breaking down. I knew Cate was human and she had emotions, but a part of me wanted to help her and I couldn't help her if she was being hot and cold with me.

"If you don't sort yourself out and woman up then things aren't going to move on and change is about moving on. No more of this uncertainty about what the future holds, this is your life, you decide what happens," I told her and then my tone softened and, for some reason, I reached over and took her hand, which was resting in her lap, in my own.

Her hand was warm and slightly sweaty with anxiety, I could see she was pushing herself, pushing herself to get back out in public. She was already trying so hard, she just needed some guidance.

"Look," I told her, confidence flooding my tone, her eyes squinted in confusion as if she didn't understand. "Not at me, at our hands, look now," I told her and her eyes shot to our hands.

I held them up and intertwined our fingers so that I could see her wedding ring, I had no idea what I was doing. This was beyond unprofessional but I'd come this far, might as well carry on.

"Right," I said and then gently took the wedding ring off of her finger, slowly so if she wanted to stop me she could have. However, she didn't stop me and so I took it all the way off and held it up in front of us.

It sparkled dully in the breif sunlight. It had been on her finger for so long, I wasn't surprised how worn it looked.

Tearing my eyes away from the ring I looked at her, she was still looking at the ring. Tears welling up in her red eyes.

"Do you know what this is?" I asked her, shaking it in front of her face and waiting for her to answer and as she opened her mouth to do so, I interrupted.

"Trash," I scoffed and then tossed it behind my shoulder, as if it was worth nothing, I heard it clang against something in the car and then drop to the floor with a weak thud. "What is it, Cate?" I asked her, wanting to imprint my message into her head. She was a strong woman, she had to move on.

She hesitated at first still staring at where I'd thrown the ring, the hooks of what once was were still deep in her. All I wanted to do was loosen them up a bit, I could work with that.

She looked at me, she searched for something in my eyes and whatever it wax she found it because she nodded and then spoke. "Trash," she breathed and then a smile broke out on her tired face, "trash," she said again.

I nodded and beamed proudly at her, "exactly, it's time to start moving on, you can do it, if not for yourself for your kids. I'll help you, we're friends, that's what we do," I told her, squeezing her hand in my own. She gave a squeeze back and looked up at me with adoration in her eyes, it was so full on that I let go of her hand and moved back a bit.

What the hell was I doing? Shit! Since when did I start to feel sorry for her, since when did the lines between friendliness and downright adoration become blurred?

I wasn't her friend, I wasn't her confidante. I was a reporter, I was getting my story. Not getting a friend, I didn't want that, did I?

The uncertainty of it all scared me, when had I ever been uncertain about something? When it came to my dream job, when it came to showing my mother I was just as good as her I was never uncertain.

I cleared my throat, a desperate attempt to try and clear any sort of sentiment or uncertainty I had going on. Cate didn't seem to notice, or she did but for a little longer, she wanted to pretend that I was her friend and that I wasn't her because it was my job.

Not wanting to stay in the car any longer, I took off my seat belt. "Now let's go and have lunch like normal folk do!" My voice was overly perky, I just hoped she didn't pick up on it.

All she did was smile at me before getting out the car, I moved to get out the car with her but then something shone in the corner of my eye.

I looked down and at the bottom of the car and saw the wedding ring.

I'd told Cate she needed to move on and stop being uncertain. I told her that she needed to move on, maybe for this job I needed to broaden my vision.

It is my future, what it holds is entirely up to me. Not my job description.

What that would mean for me, for Cate, I didn't know. I just knew that if I carried on, things would start to get very unprofessional, very fast.