Have you ever reached the stars?

Chapter 14

Hope

Today is the day I am going back to Redwood Shores and honestly it feels like going home. The five days I spent at my aunt's house have been better than I expected. Her family is so nice. They welcomed me and made me feel at home. I never had the chance to really get to know them save for my father's stories. I vaguely remember them visiting us when I was little and then once at my grandparents'.

It was nice to be around family, to feel loved and be spoiled. My cousins are a little younger than me but we got along just fine. If we lived closer we would be great friends. Sandra may be the sister I never had and the best friend I could ever ask for but after coming to the States, meeting and interacting with new people made me realize that I am not as antisocial as I thought.

And then there's Jax. A man I never thought would make me feel so many things in so little time. Because the truth is I might have fallen in love with his kindness, his unique ability to make me laugh, his attractive smile and generally the fact that he sees me, the real me.

I will never admit this to him though and as much as it hurts me I know that there would never be anything more between us. I will be gone in two weeks and he will become a distant happy memory.

Sitting on my seat, rereading the text he sent me last night; I can't help but think if he has developed any feelings for me as well. I talked to Sandra about it earlier when she called to check when I am going home and she seems to be sharing my opinion. Nothing good comes from mixing a summer fling with emotions. I will get attached to the idea of him, to the beautiful memories we shared here and I will torture myself all winter.

I haven't booked my return ticket yet and I know that everyone is expecting me in two week's time but what if I extended my stay a little? It's not as if I have something waiting for me, job wise at least.

The thought of going back to disappointing interviews, endless job hunting and without anything certain scares me so much. I have tried to push all negative thoughts aside the time I spent here but the truth is I will need to face the real world once I step my foot on British ground. So, I decided that is better not to avoid the inevitable.

On exiting the airport, a very excited Luanne comes running towards me. Okay, I didn't expect such a warm welcome after our last encounter but I can't say I am not happy. I meant everything I told Jax last night. I wouldn't want to leave knowing that he would have to deal with Luanne and everyone else. I want him to be happy. I want him to have a peaceful but exciting life. He deserves this and so much more. Honestly he is one of the best people I have met in my life.

"Welcome back, Hope. How was your trip? Are you hungry? I am starving. Let's get something on our way to town. I know a great place." And just like that, the Luanne I first met is back and for the first time, her rumbling doesn't bother me at all. I would choose this side of hers over the mean one from my kitchen five days ago.

Hopping on the passenger seat of her very red convertible, I listen to her narrating the events that took place in my absence. She makes it seem like nothing important and although she is less dramatic than usual, I can tell the truth has changed her. I remain silent and let her finish her monologue, offering her smiles and a squeeze on her arm here and there.

"So, that being said, I am finally ready to move forward. I grieved long enough for Declan and although I was mad at first when Jax revealed everything, I know that I will continue loving him regardless. But I made some very important decisions for my life from no one and I want your opinion. I know that you probably hate me Hope because I literally ruined your fun, relaxing vacation and cockblocked poor Jax more than once but I want you to know that I really value your friendship and I want us to remain friends when you leave." Taken aback by her heart-to- heart, I nodded and smiled waiting for her to confide her decisions.