Have you ever reached the stars?

Chapter 6

Hope

On my way home, I can't stop thinking about what he told me. I am so confused but honestly I have no desire to get in the middle of any of this town's drama. I need to stick to my plan, which is to relax, clear my head and be ready to focus on finding a new job as soon as I get back to London.

On the other hand, the sadness in his eyes, his low voice and almost pleading tone when he asked me to believe in what he was telling me are something I can't easily erase from my mind. I am an idiot for feeling bad for a stranger. I am an idiot for feeling attracted to him. Still, I can't help but smile at the memory of his smile.

My dad is right. I can't stay idle for long. I am so used to being occupied all the time that I find it extremely difficult to just sit and do nothing. I have already rearranged the things in the kitchen cupboards; I made a light snack to eat and took a look at my grandparents' garage. Plenty of junk to get rid of but before I start sorting them out, a text from Luanne reminding me about tonight's party stops me from carrying on.

What should I wear? The truth is it's been years since the last time I attended a beach party. Going through my wardrobe I decide for something casual and comfy. A long, loose-fitting, button-through dress in a perfect shade of blue seems ideal. The thin stripes and the low cut at the back don't allow me to wear a bra but I am confident that the girls won't disappoint me; they still stand proud and have never shamed me so far.

I let my hair dry naturally and apply only a little makeup. I used to love my wavy hair but always thought that straightening it, seemed more professional. I don't have to worry about that now, do I? Tonight, I am just a tourist, a woman visiting a coastal town, trying to have some fun among strangers. How wrong can that go?

Brown, leather, flat sandals and a matching backpack complete my outfit and I hop on the driving seat of my truck. I still can't believe I drive this thing. Dad will be so proud once I tell him. Turning on the radio, I try to get in the mood. It's my first night out here. I seem determined to have fun but there is a nagging feeling of betrayal creeping inside me. What if Luanne doesn't approve of me hanging out with Jax? I know that it's none of her business but still it feels wrong to me.

I don't even know if I'll run into him. The whole town is supposed to be there tonight and if half of the things I hear on the radio on my way there are true, everyone will be too wasted to notice me. Free drinks, barbeque and a karaoke competition just to name a few.

There is a long line of vehicles once I approach the spot but I manage to park this beast with no problem. Now I feel proud too. I start walking, following the many people exiting their cars. The first thing I notice is that the beach is totally different than what I saw yesterday. Gone are the umbrellas and sun beds, replaced by high tables, torches and a wooden stage.

Beautiful fairy lights adorn the three bars and a dj is already on the decks. Kids are running, people are dancing and laughing, creating a beautiful atmosphere. Searching for Luanne seems futile at this point so I opt for the bar closest to me. Neither of Luanne's friends is the bartender but another friendly man is eager to take my order.

Thanking him, I take a sip from the plastic cup and decide to mix with the others. It's not long before random people stop me, welcoming me to the town and ask random question. I guess Jax wasn't kidding when he said this would be a little overwhelming. My mouth starts to ache from smiling too much but I try to remain pleasant.

I am astonished again by the number of people speaking highly of my parents. My mood is instantly changed though, when a group of women starts congratulating me on my work. They are so nice to me and I am afraid to destroy the perfect picture they painted of me. I am not successful, I am a failure. My mind wants to scream, to tell them that I am nothing like they think that there is absolutely no reason why they should look up at me but I am too much of a coward to tell the truth. So, I smile and smile until they are done with their wonderful comments and the reminiscing of my past successes.