Fine denial

Chapter 11

Edward's POV

It was the day of Alice's and Jasper's graduation party. I had skipped school to help Alice with the decoration while the rest planned on coming later as they had already done their part yesterday. Plus, it was a perfect chance to stay away from Bella. I could no longer look at her without feeling a pain in my heart.

"Edward?" Alice called as she walked into the living room. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine. Why?" I asked as I stuck the decorations up on the ceiling.

"Because you have been doing the same thing for the past hour?" Alice gave me a questioning look.

"I'm sorry I'm just....distracted I guess."

"Because of Bella?" Alice pulled me to the couch and sat down next to me.

"Yeah I guess. I screwed everything up." I held my head in my hands and closed my eyes. I felt Alice's hand on my shoulder as she soothed me.

"I'm sorry, Edward. Maybe you should try to talk to her again?" Alice suggested.

"She hates me, Alice! She won't even look at me how am I supposed to talk to her?" I asked, exasperated.

"Well, we all know how close you both were and as tough as Bella is, she wouldn't just throw it all away! She treasures friendship more than anything." Alice whispered.

"Exactly why she hates me now isn't it? She trusted me with the promise I made and I couldn't even keep it unbroken. I'm such an idiot." My heart felt like it was going to explode. Bella was my best friend and possibly the girl I love but I lost her because I was being such a fool. Why did I even go after Tanya? Bella is a hundred times prettier and smarter and nicer than her. If only I could rewind time..

"Do you like Bella?" Alice suddenly asked and I looked up at her. I was speechless for a moment as I thought of what to say.

"I think so." I muttered.

"Then go talk to her! Tell her you like her! You guys have great chemistry!" Alice suddenly squealed.

"What? I can't do that! She has Jacob and I'm with Tanya now."

"So? Fight for what you want, Edward. You're not 8 anymore. Do what your heart desires." Alice encouraged. "Tonight will be the best time for that. And speaking of tonight, I've still got things to do. I'll talk to you later okay?" Alice stood up and skipped upstairs to start decorating the second floor. I stayed on the couch as thoughts of Bella flooded my mind.

I took out my phone and looked through my photo gallery, scanning for pictures with Bella. I had a separate album for us and I opened it. She was either smiling or smoking or singing or being candid in all of the pictures and I swiped through all of them. She was beautiful in every possible way, I can't believe I screwed things up with her. I had to make it right and I will, tonight.

~~~

"Welcome welcome!" Alice sang as she greeted the guests. All of them were from our school but I only recognized some. My stomach started to feel queasy as I wondered where Bella was. I didn't know if I had enough courage to talk to her about how I felt. What if she loved Jacob instead?

Just as I chugged down my second cup of vodka, I saw Bella walk into the house. She was wearing a baby blue button up shirt with her first two buttons unbuttoned and a black jeans to go with it. Her hair fell over her right shoulder, exposing her helix piercing on her left ear. I realized that she had changed her stud to a helix ring. It suited her, she looked amazing.

Jacob came in behind her and I scoffed. He wrapped his arm around Bella's waist and pulled her closer to him. Bella smiled and leaned up to kiss him; I opened the vodka bottle and poured myself another glass.