-CONTAINS SMUT-
Taken from an asylum you've been a part of the Avengers since 2012. Under house arrest and jumping from mission to mission you were tired. After Natasha broke you and the rest of team Cap out you were assigned to a mission in Wakanda...
"We have a problem!" You exclaimed, bursting into the living room with a panicked look on your face.
"No, you have a problem. I have an idiot who caused the problem." Bucky looked up from his book un-phased.
"Come here, I need your help." You ignored his comment and urged him to get off the couch.
"Alright calm down, doll." He replied and shut his book, removing himself from the sofa and joining you by the door. You grabbed his hand and pulled out to the front yard.
"What's the problem?" He looked around at the familiar landscape not spotting a single difference except for the odd pen you had built why he was away on a mission..and the goats in it. A cream goat bleated awkwardly and chomped down on the side of her trough.
"You got me goats?!" He exclaimed and pulled you into a tight embrace, lifting your feet off the ground.
"I did," you laughed, melting into the hug.
"What are their names?" He asked, putting you down.
"Sienna, Raini and Oli." You pointed to them all in order.
"You're the best Y/n, thank you!" He hugged you again.
"You're welcome, Buck." You smiled and squeezed his hand tight.
"Ok my turn, I got you something but it's not as cool as this." He gestured to the goat family you had adopted. You followed him back into the house and into the living room. He kneeled to the ground and looked under the sofa for something.
You stood awkwardly and watched him pull at medium sized package wrapped in a deep purple wrapping paper with a gorgeous silver bow on top.
"It's not much but here," he handed you the gift which you took cautiously. You pulled the bow allowing it come undone and set it aside. You carefully peeled back the plum wrapping paper.
Underneath the paper was a cardboard box that you opened with ease due to your nails. The box opened up to reveal an array of aged artifacts. You recognized these items but you couldn't believe it.
The first item you picked up was a piece of yellowed paper with your pink swoopy hand writing. Underneath of the paper was a framed painting of a very handsome man. The last thing in the box was a tattered leather book with pressed flowers and doodles of mushrooms and crystals in the margins.
"I know it's your favorite book but I wanted you to remember me." Your lover handed you the leather book in pristine condition. You flipped to the first page where your initials and his were written in beautiful black ink.
"I love it. Thank you, Daire." You smiled.
In your sleep, your coven whisked you away from his cottage and stripped you of your power for falling in love with Daire. You left the novel at his house and never returned to retrieved it.
You looked over the letter once more.
Dear Daire,
My deepest apologies. I cannot continue to see you. My own mother took my power used it as her own because I fell in love with you. I understand that I have never told you this before but I do love you but I cannot anymore. It hurts my heart knowing that when this letter finds you it will hurt you as well but my own well-being is my priority in this very moment. I regret not telling you sooner.
With love, Y/n
"H-how did you find all of this?" Your voice cracked and you looked up at Bucky who had a nervous expression plastered on his face.
"I did some research.." He responded quietly.
"I don't even know how to feel," you looked down at the letter, portrait and book.
"I'm sorry, I thought it was stupid-" You cut him off with a tight hug.
"It wasn't stupid, it was something I've longed for." You assured him as tears filled up your eyes.
"Would you like to know how he passed?" Bucky stared down at the floor, hoping that wasn't a dumb question.
"Yes please," you replied in the most comforting way.
"An article on the internet informed me that he passed of the Bubonic Plague survived by his daughter and wife.." Bucky looked at his phone, his face turning a ghostly pale color.
"He moved on.." You whispered. Bucky didn't know what to do but in an instant tears were streaming down your face. You made no sound but you stared there.
"Hey, it's alright. Thats his loss." Bucky tried comforting you.
"No it's mine, why was I such an idiot?" You sniffled.
"You weren't an idiot, you did what you thought you had too." He assured you.
"But I messed up and he moved on and now..well now he's gone." You began to sob.
"Do you think he moved on instantly? Look at this," he held up the book and pressed flowers slipped out, "he obviously still cared and missed you. He kept your stuff and added more doodles." He reminded you.
"Do you think he felt guilty?" You asked.
"One hundred percent. You were his first love. But you have to understand, you can move on too." Bucky told you. You finally looked him in the eyes.
"I can?" You squeaked.
"Of course you can, you deserve it." He smiled and wrapped his arm around you. You returned the hug, resting your head on his shoulder.
"Thank you, Buck." You sighed.
"Anything for you, Y/n." He replied with a smile on his face.
He never fully forgave himself for that pep talk but as long as you were happy he tried his best to be as well.
*
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The amount of times I've had rewrite something because I forgot Bucky doesn't have two arms is ridiculous.
