Not Forgiven but Forgotten

What Once Was Mine

(They're still 12)

I could have apologized. I could have never said those mean things in the first place. But I didn't. I said those mean things and I didn't apologize.

I had pushed Maxine out of the way and walked back into FTRS. I didn't apologize for my actions. I didn't act better. I acted just as rude.

I have a good reason, I promise!

I had just found out that I was part of a large group of people, all over the multiverse. We're called "The Gillys". We're all the same person, well, mostly. We all come from the same family but most of us are clones and we all have different powers.

I found out that the Gillys have made some powerful enemies over the past few months, which means that everyone I care for is in danger! If I had apologized to my friends, it could have killed them.

I still feel absolutely terrible though! I miss my friends so much! If I could've told them I would have right then and there! I wish I could've.

I look out the window of my dorm. Kayla hasn't even entered our dorm room in weeks. I feel so alone in this world.

I see my former friends out my window. They're all having so much fun, running around with each other, talking and laughing.

Ollie and Jax still talk to me every once in a while, but every time they do I have to be as rude as possible to protect them.

I feel a single tear slide down my face.

"Why does all of this happen to me? I'm only 12. I shouldn't have to put up with all of this." I whisper to myself.

I wish I could run out there and apologize a million times. I wish I could tell them how sorry I am and why I did it. But I can't, and I won't. I care about them way too much.

More tears start rolling down my face. I don't know how I can do this.

"Gillian. Is everything alright?" Miri asks.

Miri is the only person that I can tell my troubles about, though she's more a mirror than a person.

I turn to my mirror and look at my face in the reflection.

"Hi Miri." I manage to say through the tears.

"Is it your friends again? You must miss them so much." Miri asks.

I start to wipe the tears off my face.

"It's fine Miri. I have to do this for them, even if they don't know it. Even if they'll never know it." I tell Miri.

"Gillian, are you sure you don't want to tell anyone else?" Miri asks me.

"I'm sure. I don't want to put anyone else in danger." I say.

"Alright Gillian. I have to go now. Please, take care of yourself. I know that you care for so many other people, but don't forget to care about yourself." Miri tells me, disappearing from the mirror.

I feel the smallest smile appear on my face. It's nice to know that someone cares.