Venting Writing

Venting Writing #4

8 April 2015 3:04 pm

Untitled

I am SO sick and tired.

I am sick and tired of the bull

I am sick and tired of the fuckery

(excuse my language)

But I am just SO sick of it!

It is one of the MANY reasons why I want to get tf out of here!

By that I mean I WANT to get out of this country

Don't get me wrong I appreciate the freedom and help we get here

But it is just SO corrupt and fudged up!

Take Australia for example,

You have to pay for EVERYTHING

"BUT the jobs pay really well

Everything balances each other out"

(words from my sister from another mother)

But anyways it is so true!

Although there is like no help from the government

People are still doing really well

As compared to those here in the US

I would LOVE to go to Ireland, the UK, or maybe even Australia

I have to get my stuff together first.

Remember 'Disappointment and Darkness', my second venting "poem"?

(at least that's what my friends call these)

Well if you don't or haven't read it you should check it out

And hopefully what I am about to say sheds some light

And you know what I am talking about if you get confused.

Anyways, I REALLY NEED to get my stuff together.

I need to get organized and find a way to deal with stress and school

Other than writing it out that is

Like I need to find a way to get ALL of my work done

And STAY on top of my work and such

Even when I become ill and have health issues,

As I have been having for the past year.

When things get better they QUICKLY fall apart

As soon as I am out in the cold for too long

Or enjoy eating ice cream or crunch on some ice.

Life is rough not being able to enjoy simple and small pleasures

Such as eating ice cream whenever I would like.

Whenever I have ice cream or ice

or am just in the cold for a certain amount of time

My nose gets really cold and I start coughing and so on.

Sorry for the little off topic rant.

Now back to the main topic and issue I WANT to leave this country

I STRONGLY dislike the corruption we have here

Everything is soooo messed up even the media

Everything is so focused on the "perfect" body image

Making it seem like girls HAVE to be skinny, thin, have long hair, wear makeup, etc.

Just to be considered pretty or beautiful

Yeah there are things here and there that promote being natural

And just loving yourself but unfortunately the negatives

Out weigh the positives here and it is just sad

I am NOT saying that I HATE this country.

But I am saying that I STRONGLY dislike all the issues we have

Everything is so messed up it drives me nuts/mad!

Whereas in other countries they don't have to deal with many

If not most of the issues we deal with here

If they do deal with these issues you probably don't see them so often.

Or not as often as we do here

(On a side note I AM SO DONE with my sisters right now! Lol they were yelling "SAVE THE VAGINA!" while we were eating outside at a table we are so weird!)

Anyways I also don't like how dependent we are upon one another here.

Like nearly everyone is dependent upon someone

For SOMETHING whether it deals with money, food, whatever

Most of us are depending on someone for something in order to live.

I honestly do not like being dependent upon someone

Even my parents, which is why I try my best NOT to ask them for money

Which upsets them, mainly my dad, when I don't tell them when I don't have money

And I know that unless I leave this country

And go to what I call an independent country

Like Ireland, UK, or Australia I will NOT EVER

Become independent like I want to be.

I really don't like asking for help so I try to do everything by myself

It takes quite a bit for me to ask someone for help

Depending on what it is.

One of my close friends, who's like a brother figure here at uni, is the same way as me

He does not like to ask for help

We don't like to ask for help from others for pretty much the same reasons:

We do not want to burden anyone by asking for help,

We do not want to set ourselves up for disappointment,

We like to do things ourselves because we know what we want to accomplish

Whereas if we ask someone for help they may screw it all up

Then we will become frustrated because we have to do extra work,

We do not want to do extra work, and many more reasons.

Although we ask each other and others for help with homework

It is mostly because we don't understand what we have to do

Or some other reason other than that we keep to ourselves

When it comes to completing a task or something.

We both also keep to ourselves and try not to burden those around us with our problems and issues and such as well as bottle up all of our true feelings and emotions

BUT that is a WHOLE 'nother story to talk to about.