18.

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Nick slept through his entire morning lecture. He almost missed the one in the afternoon as well, but woke with a start twenty minutes before it started. The other students would have to forgive him his hungover-face. He'd at least tried to smell okay by changing all his clothes down to the underwear and socks, and spraying on some extra deodorant. Part of the smell effort was rendered moot as he had to run the last half of the route to make it in time. And once Nick set foot inside the lecture hall, he instantly wished he hadn't. 

From the get go, it was clear they had to take a test today. Fuck. Nick knew it'd happen somewhere this week, but college had just felt really far away from reality ever since yesterday. Since it was too late to leave without it looking strange, Nick took a seat. If this were a maths or models class, he could at least try to get some of the answers. But this test was all about economic case studies and theories; none of the answers could be deciphered without actually studying.  

Nick exited the lecture hall with a heavy heart thirty minutes later—the minimum time he was required to sit there and stare at a blank piece of paper before he was allowed to leave.  Had he expected to do great in college? No, not necessarily. He'd never been a star-student, and he probably would've ended up watching shows more than studying if he lived like a hermit as was the plan. But failing a course this miserably right out the gate wasn't something Nick expected either. He'd really have to try harder next time to fix this grade, starting immediately. 

Headache or not, Nick was set on making something out of his day. Even if he'd rather go home, crawl under the covers, and sleep the rest of his hours away too. Nick walked to the library, expecting to spend the rest of the afternoon alone with his laptop. But as he descended the spiralling staircases leading to study area with tables set up in long rows, his phone buzzed in his pocket. Alex' name flashed through his mind. 

With his luck, it was probably his mom or one of the guys from the football team sharing a stupid meme or video. Still, when Nick settled in the corner of the room, every thought of studying was long gone at the prospect of maybe talking to Alex. 

Nick took his phone out of his pocket, and his heart skipped a beat when he saw the notification was indeed from Alex. He got lucky for once.

Alex: Hey, I'm home. Already missing NL :(

Alex had attached a picture showing grey streets and dreary, rainy weather to his message. Nick first typed a reply telling Alex to come back to The Netherlands and stay longer, but he deleted it and went for something lighter. 

Nick: Wow! That was fast. Had a good flight?

Alex: Yeah, it was fine! Uneventful.  

Alex: So how did the thing with your roommate end? 

A lot less uneventful. Nick took a moment to think about how to phrase this in a positive manner for Alex. But as if Blake could hear Nick talking to Alex, another notification popped up on Nick's screen. From Blake.

Blake: Hey do you want to have dinner together tonight?

Nick stared at the notification. Then he frowned and opened the message, thinking his phone was somehow malfunctioning and depicting the wrong name. 

But no, there it was. Blake's profile picture: him with a little black dog in his arms. It was an old photo because his hair was a lot shorter there. They had no text history yet because this was the first time Blake had ever talked to Nick in private. They only had each other's number in the first place because Sem was lazy and dumped them in one chat when they met up together. 

Nick shook his head. But even when he closed the chat application and reloaded it just to make sure, Blake's question was still there. And so was Alex' question. Nick went to his chat with Alex first. 

Nick: Still pending

Alex: ? Pending? You didn't see him yet?

Nick: No I did. But now he wants to have dinner together tonight

Alex: Okay.

Alex: Correct me if I'm wrong, but that sounds like a good sign to me.

Nick sighed. To an outsider who didn't know Blake very well this would sound like a good sign. But Nick knew that if he accepted, he'd only get interrogated about his so-called 'bi-awakening' further because Blake wanted the dirty details. Before today Blake had never shown any interest in Nick or his life, but now that there was juicy gossip he suddenly wanted to hang out. And once he got his information or realised he wasn't going to get it, he'd be gone again. This was a trap.

Nick: I know it sounds good. But trust me, it's not when it's coming from him.

Alex: You think he secretly wants to poison you? 

Nick: Hah. No, but we just don't get along and he's nosy.

Alex: Sounds to me like he'd like to try and get along better. 
You're going to have to live together anyway, why not go? 

Nick sighed. Why did Alex have to sound so practical about this? Nick was pretty sure this wasn't an attempt to 'get along better' from Blake's side. But trying to explain to an outsider, who didn't know their history, why dinner probably wasn't a nice gesture made Nick sound like he was being unreasonable. But Blake being a gossip was a legitimate reason to not want to hang out with him, right? 

Nick opened his chat with Blake and stared at the dinner invitation for a few more moments before typing his reply. 

Nick: Why?

There was literally a millisecond break before Blake jumped online and he immediately started typing.

Blake:  why not?

Nick: You realise I'm not going to talk, right

Blake: crush my hopes and dreams immediately why don't you :p

Nick rolled his eyes. He figured it was done after this—Blake wouldn't reply anymore and Nick considered his offer for dinner retracted. But then his phone buzzed again.

Blake: so, are you coming or not? 

Nick nearly dropped his phone on the table in surprise. Blake still wanted to have dinner with him? Nick couldn't, for the life of him, understand why Blake would ask this. He'd never seemed to like Nick at all, and always mocked him or did things to make him uncomfortable. They'd never gotten along, every encounter was awkward, and they only saw each other because of Sem. That fact hadn't changed just because Nick had kissed a guy. They wouldn't magically get along and have a good time now. 

Okay, but... maybe Nick kissing a guy wouldn't immediately change things. It could lead to change, however. If they could just have one talk so they wouldn't have this weird tension between them all the time, maybe that was worth one uncomfortable dinner.

Nick sighed deeply. He still felt like he was walking right into a trap. Still, he typed a variation of the same response to both Alex and Blake. 

To Alex: "Okay, you're right. I'll give it a go."  

And to Blake: "Okay, I'll be there." 

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