Why Doesn't He Love Me

Chapter 6

Zayn's Pov

I've seen a lot of fucked up shit before but the is by far the worse. When Liam and I enter the house the first thing we see is Harry straddling Louis while they have a heated make out session. Right before Harry pulls off Louis shirt We clear our throats signaling that we are here. Once they manage to pull away They turn and see us and they looked scared. They have a lot of explaining to do.

"So this is why you broke up with Niall. Because you were cheating on him with Louis. He is fucking so broken right now and your just snogging away with one of our best mates." I end up yelling at him trying to control my anger and keep Niall's secret all at the same time. Liam is holding me back because if he wasn't I would be on top of Harry tackling him to the floor by now.

"I didn't cheat on Niall okay. I just started to love Louis a little more and Niall a little less as each day that came around." Harry finishes trying to explain their actions attempting to make me less mad but it isn't working.

"its like your not phased by this at all like even if I broke up with a girl I would beat myself up a little even if I didn't even like her at all. So what now, are you guys dating"

I asks still very pissed off. He is acting like his whole entire relationship with Niall was a fucking lie and he just used Niall to get in his pants.

"Yes actually we are" Louis speaks for the both of them. I really can't wrap my head around how Harry is acting right now.

"Why are you so fucking mad mate I at least thought you would be happy for us" Harry says with a slight frown on his face.

"I am happy for you it's just that your acting like you used Niall and that hurts. He is so fragile physically and emotionally and it just hurts to see him so broken and you not broken at all. All I'm trying to say is that you should go talk to him" I finish my rant. They all look at me with sympathy and I don't know why. Then Liam hands me a tissue and I realize I am crying. I'm just afraid for Niall and I can't say anything about it to the other boys only because I promised I wouldn't.

"I planned to go talk to him in a few days just to tell him that we are dating. I'll also see how he is holding up okay. Until then can you guys please not tell Niall. It's to soon to tell him."

"Okay we won't. We have to go now but call us after you go visit Niall." Liam says pushing me towards the door to leave.

"Okay" Harry sighs right before we exit the front door

_-_-_

September 12th

Niall's Pov

It has been 11 days since Harry broke up with me. I've been trying to forget him but it's not working at all. Everything reminds me of him. I've been moping around my flat for most of the time. Liam and Zayn have been coming by twice a day now to try and cheer me up and it works for a little bit. I have a great time when they're here but when they leave My thoughts get the best of me and I dwell on the past far more than anyone should. I've cut about nine more times. The only time I didn't cut was because Liam and/or Zayn would spend the night. I've been more careful when cutting though. Making sure to cover up my tracks and only cut so that I can cover them up with boxers. Liam and Zayn just left to go get some lunch so I decide that I have enough time to cut. Just as I'm about to get out of the bed I hear his voice again. The voice I haven't heard in 11 days. The voice that could lift me up and break me down all in a matter of seconds. The voice that makes my heart melt every time I hear it.

It's Harry's voice.

Harry's Pov

"Niall" I call throughout the house. I'm really nervous about talking to him for some strange reason. I hope he takes the news well because it would mean the world to me if he did.

"Y-y-yes" Niall stutters out. I follow his voice which leads me to the bedroom. He is laying in his bed with messy hair and a confused look on his face. He doesn't have a shirt on and he looks quite good.

"Hey Ni how are you" I say sitting next to him

"Not bad what about yourself" he says. I can tell he is lying. I've always been able to tell when he lies but I don't want to upset him more so I just pretend I don't notice.

"I good great actually. I really came here to check up on you and tell you something" I smile making him smile a small smile

"Which is"

"Me and Louis are dating" I smile. I see a flash of hurt in his eyes but he quickly hides it with a Smile

"How long have you two been dating" he asks

"September 1st" I say pushing back my hair

"Well if your happy I'm happy" He says smiling again

"Thanks mate it means the world to me that you approve of us" I thank him. He is taking this a lot better that i expected. "I told Louis I would be home at 11:45 and it's 11:40 now so I should probably get going but I will see you tomorrow Ni ok" I say getting up. He nods his head and waves goodbye as I leave his flat.

That went very well. Maybe just a little to well.

Niall's Pov

When I hear the front door close all I can do is break down. I mean you would think that I would know that this Larry Stylinson idea was real if we were all in the same band but I must of been to caught up in my love for Harry I didn't notice. I don't know what to do with myself anymore. I feel so numb right now. I get up and run to the bathroom looking for my blade. I'm not worth of his love. I'm not worth anything. I deserve this. I find the blade and swipe it across my hip not caring if Liam or Zayn sees it. I only cut once but it was enough for me. I pull a black washcloth out the closet and wet it pressing it to the cut for a couple of minutes trying to stop the bleeding. When the bleeding stops I put a band-aid on it and look for my phone. When I find it I call Liam.

"Hey Niall I'm almost there did you need something else while I was out" Liam answers

"Did you know Harry and Louis were dating" I asked my voice breaking at the end

"Niall can we talk about this when I get there" he asks me sighing deeply. I can imagine him running his hand through his hair as both him and Harry did that when they were stressed or in really deep thought.

"No answer the God damn question Liam" I yell into the phone not angry more so just confused and hurt and wanting answers.

"Yes I knew Niall I knew they were dating" He says sighing

"When did you find out" I say quietly, sliding down the wall onto the floor.

"When we left your house the day you guys broke up we went to go check on Harry and when we walked in we saw them snogging. We asked if they were dating and they were and we promised we wouldn't say anything because he wanted to tell you himself" he explained. I couldn't say anything. I honestly don't know how I should react to this. " Niall I'm sorry I know you really did love him and this is hard to take in in such a short period of time but as life goes on the pain your feeling right now will fade. Take it from me. When me and Danielle broke up I was a mess just like you but now I have Sophia and I couldn't be happier. It's going to be okay Ni. It just takes time ok." he says. I nod then realize he cant see me.

"Okay. Are you here yet I'm a little hungry"

"There's our boy we will be there in two minutes" he says cheerily and I can hear Zayn cheering in the background.

"Okay bye guys." I chuckle rolling my eyes and ending the call. I throw my phone on my bed sighing deeply. Harry never loved you. He just wanted to get in your pants, and you let him. I bet he was hooking up with Louis all along. All these thoughts started to pile up and I knew they were true. Who would ever love me. As soon as I heard the front door handle jiggle I put on my fake smile that seems to have everybody convinced that I'm okay but really...

I'm falling apart piece by piece and I wish someone would notice.