Fezco // Safe Space (𝔼𝕦𝕡𝕙𝕠𝕣𝕚𝕒)

Chapter 14

Sofia's POV

"So what's been goin on with you?" Fez asks me as he shuts the front door behind him, locking it afterwards. "I've been staying to myself these past few days, something happened and..." I trailed off, looking to the floor and he came closer to me.

"You know, you don't have to talk about anything you not comfortable with... I bring you here to forget about your problems, not force you to talk about them." he takes a pre rolled blunt out of his pocket. "Unless you'd rather talk about it instead" he smirks. I feel a smile creeping on to my face. "I think we both know that smoking this will make me feel a lot better than talking about it" I tell him honestly.

I follow him in the hallway that leads to his bedroom and he brings the blunt to his lips before sparking it. He passes it to me after we enter the room, and he shuts the door behind him so Ash doesn't bother us. 

"I sprinkled some hash in there" he mentions and I sit at the end of his bed, taking another hit. "we about to be real fried then huh" I say. "I guess so" he chuckles, putting his things down and looking over at me. "Why you sitting at the edge of the bed like that?" he asks. "You act like you never been here before... you can get comfortable you know. I was gonna put a movie on" he tells me. 

After not seeing Fez for over a week, I felt nervous. Despite being exhausted from the previous days and despite always feeling safe in his house, I still got this weird feeling every time he was around me and I couldn't figure out why.

I might be catching feelings for him. I got butterflies in the car when he handed me the food, and I got butterflies when he opened the door for me on the way inside. It sounds like basic manners, but Fezco is a lot more thoughtful than my boyfriend in the ways that actually matter to me. Devin doesn't speak my love language, but he does buy me everything under the sun. 

I passed him the blunt when he got situated in bed, and he turned on the tv. I found myself scooting closer to him like he said and making myself comfortable in his bed instead of lingering at the edge. We ended up getting closer and closer without even realizing it, smoking the blunt until it was gone. Halfway through the movie we were basically cuddled up next to each other. The warmth from his body radiated on to mine and made me feel cozy.

Seeing him has become a regular thing, and after not having him this close to me over the past week it almost felt refreshing. Being in his presence again and even the smell of his clothes. It gives me a sense of security. Something about him makes me want to keep coming back.

I found myself leaning in toward him more again, and this time he noticed because I snuggled up to his chest. I felt his heart thumping in his chest and it made my cheeks turn red. I wonder if being this close with me does something to him too. He hesitates before stroking my hair, using his fingers to comb through it. 

"Your not wearing your necklace today" he points out, continuing to play with a strand of my hair. "I got rid of it" I say dryly. "I should've kept it and gave it to Ash, he would've pawned it for me" I continue. He combs his fingers through my hair some more, reaching the end of my shoulder length strands.

He lets his hand fall to my shoulder, stroking my collarbone and then dragging his fingers down my arm. "Why would you do that?" he asks and begins rubbing my arm gently. "Broke up with your boyfriend or something?" he whispers softly in my ear while touching me.

"Something like that" I say in a shaky voice, taking in a deep breath and holding back a small moan. Even though he isn't doing anything sexual, he has no idea what it does to me when he touches me this way. Caressing my arm and pampering me in ways I haven't been treated by anyone else. I don't even get this intimate with Devin, the sex is almost always for him too. When I'm with Fez, everything is always about me.

I feel him breathing on my neck now, making me blush. "that's good to hear." he says quietly, brushing his lips against my neck. I leaned my head back slightly so he could have better access to kiss my neck, but instead he stopped himself. He also stopped rubbing my arm when he reached my wrist. He held on to my wrist, bringing it closer to him and making me flinch. 

He let go when I pulled my arm back, but he looked at me briefly before wrapping his hand around my wrist again. He pulled my arm closer to him by the wrist and studied the bruises, a look I've never seen before coming on to his face. Almost like a flip switched. I didn't bother saying anything. 

"He did this to you?" he asks in a very upset tone of voice. "he grabbed you like that? are you fuckin kidding me" he says, fixing himself to sit up straight in the bed and take a better look at me. "It's not that bad" I say, not realizing I made a mistake.

"Not that bad? Sofia, just hearing you say that shit makes me wanna bodyslam you" he tells me and I chuckle lightly, shaking my head and looking down. Please change the subject, I think to myself. "I'm not playin, this shits for real. It's not funny. Look at your arm" he reminds me, wiping the smile off my face. He begins getting up out of his bed. He exhales deeply and walks around in circles with his hands on his head. He seems really stressed out, and it's not even his arm. He stops for a moment in the corner and just stands there, turned the opposite way in silence. 

"Fez" I call for him to turn around, but when he does he has this evil look on his face like he made some type of decision. "I'm gon kill that motherfucker" he says bluntly, not laughing or smirking. Being dead serious.

"I can't break up with him, like, for good, Fez. I know you told me that I should have done it a while ago, but you don't understand. There is more to the story." I tell him. "LOOK AT YOUR ARM" he raises his voice slightly at me. "My arm doesn't matter, okay? Not in my situation. My parents would never let me break up with him." I explain, wanting to come closer to him. He crosses his arms, waiting for me to speak again.

"He does a lot of things for my family. He pays my moms medical bills, he-" Fez cuts me off mid sentence. "Sofia, I'm not gonna lie to you I don't give a fuck if this dude was the president of the United States. No guy should put their hands on a woman. I don't care about what you think he does for you or your family. I could do these things if you'd let me. You just need to understand the importance of leaving this motherfucker alone for good after he did that to you." he says sympathetically.

"Fez, this is not my fault" I tell him. His look softens and he comes closer to the bed again.

"It's not your fault Sofia, I never said that. I'm sayin this shit is fuckin ridiculous that you've been stuck with this bozo all this time and he's been putting his hands on you. That shits not alright" he explains. Fez talks with his hands a lot. I notice all of his mannerisms and every little thing about him. Even though he's upset, I still find myself studying him and wishing he would just come lay back down with me. The bruises were old news to me. But apparently, they triggered something in him because he wouldn't let go of the subject.

"Let me get you some ice" he says, deciding to drop it for now. When he leaves the room I hear him and Ashtray whispering about something in the other room, so I decided to listen in. I heard my name, but the rest of the conversation was too quiet for me to be eavesdropping. 

I went back over to his bed and laid down, him coming into the room shortly after. He came directly over to me and wrapped a bag of frozen peas around my wrist, holding it there with paper towels so it wouldn't be too ice cold on my skin. "Thank you" I say quietly, him looking up at me. He doesn't respond and looks back down at my wrist. After a moment of silence, he decides to speak up again.

"You really need to stay away from him. I'm being dead serious" he tells me. I sigh, knowing that I can't listen to him even though that's what he truly wants. He just wants to keep me safe. But despite us breaking up, I know I'll never hear the end of it from my mom if I don't decide to comply with Devin soon enough. As much as I want to, I can't ignore him forever. He already wants to fix things.

"Sofia" he says, trying to get me to focus on what he's saying. "I can't" I respond quickly, looking down at my wrist where he was holding the bag of peas. "It's not my choice" I whisper, my eyes watering up. I made sure to hold back any tears from falling, but I knew deep down in my heart that this would not end well. Between me and Devin or me and Fez. I can't have 2 boyfriends.

Fez never mentioned anything about being my boyfriend, but he says he likes me a lot and everybody knows what that means. We already kissed, and continued to see each other after that. He was just flirting with me and almost kissed down my neck. It's pretty obvious where we stand with each other, and it definitely isn't the friend zone. 

You can't lead people on like how I'm doing to Fezco, it would drive anybody crazy. I do feel bad for him. He doesn't deserve this. But it doesn't feel  like I'm leading him on. I really do like him, and the way he makes me feel has made me realize that I want him in more ways than just a friend. But none of the things I want in life have ever mattered, or been my choice. Dating Devin is the worst mistake I have ever made in my life, and if I could take it back I would. I would trade him for Fez in a heartbeat.

Now that Fez is aware of my situation, he knows that even though I broke up with Devin and threw the necklace on the ground, it still wouldn't make a difference or last very long. The second he shows up to my house at the right time or convinces my mom to manipulate me into taking him back, my dreams of being free from my cage of a relationship are over.

Devin could make my life a living hell if he wanted to, he has that power. The only thing stopping him is me and my decision to stay with him. If this "break up" lasts too long, he will start to do things to make my life miserable. I'm already dealing with too much.

"I won't let this happen to you again" Fez mumbles. 10 more minutes pass and he removes the bag of peas from my wrist, putting it back in the freezer. The bruises start to feel less sensitive and swollen, thanks to Fez. He crawls back into bed with me, keeping some distance between us.

I wonder if he's upset with me. I wouldn't blame him if that was the case, but he seems more upset with himself for some reason. He didn't do anything wrong. Maybe he thinks that he should have protected me or something, but I decide to stop thinking about it. I wouldn't want the conversation to come back up again. I just hope he forgets about it in the morning. 

I begin dozing off to the sound of the credits playing on the tv from the movie we had barely watched.

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𝕟𝕖𝕩𝕥 𝕔𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣