"No, I'm really not fine at all."
- cole -
I remembered the night I was waiting for Bea to call me to tell me she'd got to the end-of-summer party safely.
Ever since everything with James, I had to make sure my girl was safe at all costs.
I was dressed and ready to drive myself there as well, but I decided to wait for her call before I left.
About 10 minutes later, my phone started beeping madly and I picked it up to answer.
It was only Avalon, so I ignored it, waiting for Bea's call.
Avalon called another four times afterwards. The fifth time, I realised that it could be important, and picked up.
"Avalon, I love you, but I'm waiting for a call from Bea right now, can I call you-"
"Cole!" Avalon screams, and that's when my brain finally woke up. She was hysterically crying.
"Bea, she's- she's..." She couldn't get her words out, and the sobs were making her voice shake.
"A, what's wrong? What about Bea?" I question her, feeling sick to my stomach. I'd known Avalon for years, and never heard her like this.
"Bea, was- she was in an accident and Dana just called me and- Bea, Bea, she... didn't make it."
Suddenly I can't hear Avalon's crying, maybe because I'd dropped the phone, or maybe because I felt the entire world stop.
There was no way this could be real.
Bea couldn't be...dead. No way.
But I knew for a fact that Avalon would never joke about something so serious.
I fell to the ground, unable to catch my breath, but it felt like all of the air had been sucked out of the room.
It felt like my lungs had collapsed and I tried to breath harder but it didn't work.
Even if I did manage to breath properly again, that wouldn't bring Bea back.
My girl was gone.
She was gone and I couldn't get her back.
That's when I heard the ringing in my ears and I lay down, covering my head and breathing faster than I ever had, feeling the tears fall down my face.
But Bea was gone.
She was gone forever, gone and I couldn't get her back.
It was my fault. I should have picked her up. If I picked her up she'd still be here and she wouldn't be gone.
As I lay there, struggling to breath and choking on my tears, I came to one conclusion.
I deserved to be dead, not her.
//
wow holy poop i'm listening to ed sheeran and sobbing my eyes out because this just sorta happened i mean this was not planned whatsoever
i think i need a sit down and a glass of water
so that's why cole's been so sad
bet you wish you'd never found out why now
btw i'm going to dedicate the next chapter (FINAL CHAPTER) to the person with the best comment so yeah comment and stuff
anyway i'm going to go and cry some more now so bye
YOU ARE READING
amnesia // c.p [completed]
أدب الهواة"how do you wake up from a nightmare if you're not asleep" cole pendery