Living with Stray kids

poetry

Felix POV

I walked into her room it was tidy as usual her desk however a mess book and paper covered it pens littered the floor. A simple piece of paper that wasn't crumpled or scattered was a single piece of paper. I walked closer to the desk, the paper is neat.

I sit at the table and read 

He had hurt her

But she wanted him

He had never told her he loved her

But she loved him so deeply it hurt

He never told her she was gorgeous or his queen

But she knew he did, she heard his soul speak to her when she lay her head on his heart

He loved the idea of her

He loved the idea of having her

But he didn't know how much that would wound both him and her

For she loved him so deeply it hurt

And he saw her as his

So different

Yet the same

She would have lay herself in the snow and let the ravens peck at her skin

As he would have brought her all she wanted

One painful

One not

Could he ever really understand what she thought when he smirked

Could he ever really understand what she thought when he shook his head when he got shy

Could he ever really understand what she thought when he wouldn't let her let go of his hand

Could he ever really understand what she thought when he lay his hand on her thigh

Could he ever really understand what she thought when he would ramble about his world and she would sit and listen quietly watching his face memorising it because she loved him that much

He couldn't

because she still thought about those moments

She did and she hated it

She had someone else that craved her attention that wanted her that called her gorgeous that loved her

Yet he still was there lurking in her mind

Tell her she was his queen and she hated it so much

But he was there and she couldn't get rid of him the only way she could was to bleach her mind of all of it, but how could she

She couldn't that would hurt even more than remembering him

I sat back re read and re reading. I put my head in my hands 

what have i done 

my poor y/n