A River Flows Through Us

Family Night...

    After the interruption, I walked out of my room in the hopes that would give him time to process what happened. I don't know who kissed who. I feel like i'm over thinking it. It was just a in the moment thing. Great you kissed a guy who your falling for and he doesn't feel the same. After about 10 minutes of getting Bella her afternoon snack and her going off to her room, I walk back over to my room.

    Knox was still sitting in the same position, staring at the floor. Oh I fucked up. Anxiety swept over me, and I could feel myself starting sweat. I deeply wanted to go cry because of the fear of his next words. When he didn't say anything, I spoke up.

    "I'm sorry that was a mis-" i was cut off my Knox.

     Knox looked up at me while saying. "Please don't say it was mistake. I don't think it was." 

"I-I" I didn't understand what he was saying to me. Was I losing it, or is he trying to tell me he's into me? See it's moments like this that make me feel small in life. I just settled for a simple "Okay." I nodded and decided the best thing to do was ignore the whole thing. When in doubt just ignore it until it goes away. I shake off what happened and decided otp start back with what me and Knox where doing prior.

After an hour or so, me and Knox finishing the song. Thankfully we stayed apart and focused. I found out some things about him. Like how he puts oat milk in his coffee, and has some new movie deal he's about to make.

He was telling me about how he grew up literally in the streets of NewYork, being homeless. "My mom fell in love with every guy she ever dated, and then when it didn't work out she would lose her will to live. She'd lose her job, and we would lose the house. It was a constant cycle until James's dad took me in when I was 14. Mr. Dylan, kept me feed, and warm and helped me through school." He said.

"I'm so sorry," I said. I'm truth I was, no matter how bad things got money wise, they were never that bad. "What happened to your mom?"

"Oh she ran off somewhere, but that's okay, because she was never a really good mom anyways. Honestly I'm better off without her." Knox said.

I whole my head, because that hurt my heart. "No one's better off without a mom." I wanted to cry thinking about my mom being gone.

I could tell Knox felt bad about what he said, and put his bad on mine giving it a little squeeze before saying "That not what I mean i'm sorry." I looked up and him and nodded. Giving him a little smile in the hopes of reassuring him that it was okay. Knox moved his hand away and sat back more on my bed. I brought my knees up to my chest, my arms rapped around my knees and I rested my head on legs.

Lizzy opened my door in a quick and loud movement. I raised an eyebrow at her dramatic entrance. She stopped to take note of the fact that me and Knox were hanging out and not killing each other.

        "Well okay then." Lizzy said. "I was just coming to tell you it's time to go, but if y'all are too busy, I can come back." Lizzy was giggling with a huge grin.

      "Bitch shut up!" I said loudly. I rolled my eyes and got off the bed, reading her face. Clearly she was trying to push us together, and there's nothing more I hate in life than being told what to do, or how to live.

       "I'm not the slut." Lizzy said. I know what you all are thinking. Yes these seems like a real fight but in truth there's nothing Lizzy could ever do to piss me off enough to yell at her. In a weird way insults were like our love language to each other.

     So ok course I responded with, "Said by the one with a 7 year old?!" I crossed my arms and looked at Lizzy, who are staring right back at me the same way. Lizzy broke first.