in which billie gets admitted into a reform school to atone for her crimes, but is unexpectedly arriving right in the middle of a roaring gang rivalry - one that paints the entire school in blood.
"repeat after me, baby. jahseh, 'god said.' from t...
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—𝐁𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐄
monday, january 15th, 2018
four days later...
"i want this whole place on lockdown," jahseh said as people ran in and out of his room. "lock down this sector, lock down g-i, lock down j-l. nobody comes in or out unless they're from those sectors. don't let anyone that isn't mo come into this room."
jahseh turned his attention back to me and i saw his fury return as he examined the remnants of what happened. the cuts, blood and bruises that were starting to form on my body. he clenched his hands into tight fists and took deep breaths. i could tell he was trying his hardest to think rationally but his emotions were overthrowing his logic and he was about to do something he couldn't take back.
i was frozen and didn't know what to say. i didn't know what i could say, anything could happen now. i was only safe under jahseh's wing and if something happened to him then i would be a goner.
"someone stay with billie," jahseh said calmly, his fists still tightly balled. stokeley volunteered to stay with me and everyone but him and jahseh left to secure their sectors. "you stay your ass in here, don't need anything happening to you. do not leave. you need to use the bathroom? i'll have one of my girls take you and stand outside the stall. you're no longer going anywhere unattended."
after a moment of staring at me in an attempt to gather his thoughts, he finally opened his mouth.
"i'm going to kill her."
"no!" my vocal chords suddenly worked and my body was able to move again. i jumped up and grabbed his wrist. "you can't kill her. this school would be torn apart in a war. think with your head, not your heart. just stay here."
"whether or not i kill her, i'm still going to leave," he dismissed me. "didn't i say that i was going to do something really reckless if she tried to jump you in?"
"but that's if she succeeded. she didn't, so it's okay. i'm alive, i made it out, i'm okay. stay here," i pleaded.
"stay here," jahseh repeated himself, gently moving my hand from his wrist and leaving the room.
"let him go" stokely finally said. "if not then that shit'll boil over and he'll end up doing some shit worse than he was originally trying to do. just do what he says, he's looking out for you."
"i know," i settled.
"most of us are alive because even though jahseh can be a dick and do the most, we never disobeyed an order. this nigga is always on point so when he says do something we do it. and him leaving to do whatever he's about to do and telling you not to move is a strategic move on his part. just let him be."
