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I knew Jade had been doing drugs, but it wasn't until that day, at her dad's memorial, that I realised they were a greater comfort than I ever could be. Maybe that's a silly observation, but I was only 13.
Aaliyah watched as Lexi's play began. She was sitting next to Maddy and Kat who were also engrossed in the play.
Aaliyah smiled as she loved the way Lexi narrated the play. It seemed quite personal to her. The drum rolls then began and this is when it would get interesting...
It was the summer before I started ninth grade... back when we thought we'd all be friends forever.
The stage was set up as if it was picture day and Lexi introduced the characters of the play.
"There were five of us. There was me, Grace... My sister, Hallie... Her best friend, Marta... Marta's best friend, Luna. The queen bee, Bella. And my best friend, Jade."
Aaliyah looked at Bella with a frown and noticed how similar she looked to her. The hair. The makeup. Everything.
Lexi walked out with the letters OUR LIFE on stage and the room went silent "And this is life. Not everyone's life... But our life!"
Aaliyah turned to Maddy who was just as confused as her "Wait, is this fսcking play about us?"
And it definitely was...
Aaliyah shifted uncomfortably in her seat as she watched the play unfold.
It started off small with Lexi and Cassie growing up but as the play carried on, Aaliyah started to notice things she shouldn't have noticed.
Lexi was sitting on a familiar couch with a familiar sweater when a lightbulb went off in Aaliyah's head.
The girl looked at Maddy blankly "I think I know who Fez was with the other night." Maddy looked at the girl with a frown "What? Who?"
Aaliyah bit her lip nervously and looked at Lexi once more "That looks like Fezco's couch and his sweater."
Maddy touched the girls shoulder "It's just a coincidence. I mean, how would Lexi even know the guy."
Aaliyah sighed and thought back to the moment she first saw them talk. "They were together on New Year's."
Maddy looked at the girl with a shocked expression and carried on watching the play.
Aaliyah felt like walking out after her realisation but she felt even more uncomfortable when 'Bella' walked onto the stage.
She was about to be exposed by Lexi Howard of all people...
Bella was the one person I aspired to be like the most. Growing up with her was difficult because she was effortlessly beautiful and everyone appreciated that.
She even dated my first crush, Chris, who was different to any other boy at school. He was a jock but he was also an angel. He was special.
Bella kissed Chris on the cheek and smiled "I love you so much. I've never been so happy."
Aaliyah looked down knowing who Chris was supposed to be. She tried to not let it phase her but all of the memories came back to her at once.
Chris smiled at Bella "I'm gonna marry you some day, I know it."
Aaliyah could feel a panic attack coming on as she felt her throat close up.
She was finding it hard to breathe and Maddy looked at her with worry. "Are you okay?" Aaliyah nodded and squeezed on the sides of the chair.
Bella and Chris were the 'it' couple. No one had ever seen her so happy. It wasn't until a few months when they broke up and it made me think that love was such a stupid concept.
I mean, Bella would be on the phone with Hallie all night crying about it...and I would think about why it was so heartbreaking to fall out of love with someone.
Bella sat on her bed with tears in her eyes "Hallie, I feel so stupid. I did something I shouldn't have and now I'm scared. I wish I never asked him to be my boyfriend."
Aaliyah quickly stood up and walked out of the auditorium. She burst out into tears and ran to the bathroom.
She sat in a stall and put her head in her hands. Aaliyah could feel herself break as she thought back to the play.
She thought back to her relationship with Corey Miller who the play was definitely hinting at.
She thought back to Nate and Cal who made sure that Corey left town. She thought back to Cassie who she had cried to because of it.
She couldn't believe how she let that happen. She wasn't allowed to walk around knowing that she almost killed someone.
Aaliyah could feel her guilt creeping up to her all over again. She couldn't bare it and so she picked up her phone and dialled a number.
The phone rang...
Once...
Twice...
Three...
Voicemail.
Aaliyah started to cry even more knowing that Fezco wasn't answering her.
She spoke into the phone "Fez, it's me...Aaliyah. I know that you're seeing Lexi and that's fine but I wish you were honest with me. I know it's none of my business anymore ever I just want you to know that I'll always love you, okay? I'm gonna do something really stupid now and I haven't been completely been honest with you. I did something bad like a really long time ago and it's been eating me up for years. I'm gonna pay for what I did and I was hoping to hear your voice before but...it's fine. I love you, Fez. You mean everything to me and I wish you so much joy and happiness. All of the things I couldn't provide you. I just wanted you to know that. I probably won't see you for a while but take care of yourself. Bye."
Aaliyah started breathing heavily and she immediately dialled a new number.
