Bir kadın/adam gelir

Bu mesele

This is the issue

– Mother? Ne demek anne misin, Ceylin? – she knew that one day the truth would take its toll, but she wasn't ready to pay just yet. Ceylin snatched the frame from Ilgaz's hands, angry, afraid and ashamed by seeing something like disappointment in his eyes.

– That's none of your business, Ilgaz! And do us the favor of staying on the professional path, we've had our share... – she slammed the object onto the tabletop so hard that the glass shattered.

– Do you know how many years I've been waiting for you? – Ilgaz looked at her ringless fingers, at her colorless face that was on the verge of crying, anger, hopelessness. Ceylin rebuilt her own life, she had someone, a daughter, and what about him? Empty days and nights at a job that brought nothing but prestige and loneliness. – Bravo, Ceylin! Bravo! – clapped his hands, contemptuously. – My heart withered and died inside, like a plant that dries without rain. Thank you for making me understand that I've waited alone and loved alone, all these years...

– Ceylin Hanım... – a policeman knocked at her door, breaking the moment. – pardon... Berk and the others arrived, should I call them to see Ilgaz Şefi?

– Give us two minutes... – she replied, letting out her breath caught during the discussion. But Ilgaz was no longer available for that conversation:

– I don't need two minutes, you can call them. – he glared at Ceylin behind a scowl of outrage, and the policeman hesitated two minutes before she waved him off with a frustrated gesture.

– You're not allowed to disauthorize me in front of my men!

– I have something better, Ceylin Hanım: hierarchy. And, at your request, I will not stray from the professional path from now on. I haven't the slightest desire to prolong my stay here.

~*~

One call and Eren was there, at the police station, realizing that nothing had improved in their relationship.

– What's up now? Why do your faces look like they've been twisted by a monkey? – the angry expression said "don't ask" so the commissioner didn't insist. – I didn't call Neva, she stayed asleep. It was a heavy trip.

- Better that way. - then they relayed the data on the convoy of trafficked women and the men behind their kidnapping to the twelve men who would be patrolling the border. – Bojan Vlasic is the head, – the photos were distributed, an Interpol contribution. – was recognized based on the description given by a witness to prosecutor Neva Seçkin. The others are Andrija Stankic and Damir Kovac, all Serbians. We got images of them through facial recognition on CCTV in Istanbul. – so they asked several questions about the number of cars, the models, how many women were esteemed and the hour passed without Ceylin and Ilgaz exchanging a word. When he found the meeting satisfactory, the boss closed the matter and left, stomping hard.

– What happened before, abi? There was a funeral atmosphere among you. – Eren's curiosity was greater than caution. Unfortunately for Ilgaz, the matter was so stuck in his throat that he had to sit down, drink and let it out.

– I need alcohol. And soon. – finding a bar in Mardin was as easy as breathing. For two drinks they were silent while Ilgaz gathered his thoughts. – She has a daughter.

– Who...? Ceylin?! No way... – Ilgaz nodded, taking a long swig of his vodka.

– She had someone, I don't know if she still does. But she had a daughter, rebuilt her life... I don't blame her for that, Eren, I'm not such a bastard... but it pains me to know that I was nothing to her... that everything we lived through was a disposable blur. And that I'm such a loser that I held on to our past as if it mattered.

– Kardeşim... I don't believe this feeling is one-sided. I have two eyes, how can that be? And doesn't she look at you like all these years haven't passed? Allah Allah...

– She doesn't look! She doesn't look because she doesn't feel, Eren. I was a fool, a romantic...

– Ah ah, abi... I don't believe it's like that, even if I see Ceylo with her family in front of me. I saw how she received you, how she trembled at the sound of your voice. There's something that doesn't match that...

– Don't garnish the truth with flowers, Eren, that's not fit us. At least now I can free my spirit and stop dreaming of what could've been. Ceylin must be in the past, as I was for her.

~*~

At home, Ceylin was choking back tears watching her daughter sleep, because once again she arrived late enough not to catch her awake. On normal days she was grateful for having a good job that paid their bills and let them live comfortably, even sacrificing precious moments with the girl. On days when she had to deal with work stressing her mind or with her daughter's father stuck in her rut, she cursed her job and her responsibilities.

The broken picture frame now laid on the shelf in her daughter's bedroom, a reminder of the only time she managed to attend the little girl's Mother's Day party, when she was 5 years old. By the age of eight, Defne had even learned to pretend not to care. Ceylin left the room feeling bitter guilt and brooding over her reasons for never having told Ilgaz about the fruit of the one night they had when her grandfather showed up with a cup of çai.

– Hard day? – she nodded, snuggling into him on the living room couch, eyes wet and sad. – Too much work?

– Dede... Defne's father is here. – Merdan held her tighter in his embrace.

– Don't cry, kuzum. We knew that one day this moment would come.

– But I'm afraid. I couldn't hide a child that way... He will never forgive me.

– Regardless of his forgiveness, you will never cease to be the mother of our treasure. Nor will he cease to be the father. Time will be responsible for getting you both used to living together, because it's been eight sad years without him, Ceylin. Defne deserves to know that man. – with the wisdom that only years could settle in people, Merdan was calm. – Do you want a türk çai before bed?

– No, I'm going... – she wasn't going. The phone vibrated with an urgent call from the station. – Hello? Berk? Duyuyorum.

– Ceylin hanım, there was an emergency. We found the vehicle that Bojan Vlasic was using in the footage near 102 Sk. We recognized it by the chassis, the rest was consumed by fire. – the policeman's tone was that something more serious than an abandoned car had happened.

– Any victims? – it was better to be objective than to be sensitive.

– Possibly it's prosecutor Neva Seçkin's informant who was charred, we're here awaiting the results of the forensics. I believe it's a warning that they're aware of the investigation. – Ceylin believed it too. So she stiffened her voice and pushed the family drama out of her mind.

– I'm going there.