The One next door . (Karl x Chris Highschool AU)

"No matter what" (Chapter 19)

Warnings
Talking of
Self harm, Homophobia
Bullying, underage drinking.
*I promise this isn't a sad chapter, since these are said once I'm putting the warning in*

Karl POV

"what did I do the night we got drunk" I asked Chris. This is the most nervous I've ever felt but I knew I needed to ask. Chris stayed silent for a bit. "And please be honest".

"Well, you uh, you kinda asked me out" Chris said. So I did, I asked him out...

"What did I say" I asked still feeling nervous.

"Well you asked me what were we and I told you I don't know but were definitely more then friends" he explained. "Then you asked if I liked the kiss and I said yes and said we'd talk about it tomorrow, and you agreed but wanted to tell me something incase you forgot, which you did" he took a deep breath seeming to get more nervous now. "You said- you said you loved me and you'd probably never tell me when your- your sober, you said you genuinely loved me, how much I've done for you, and how you hope to be more then friends" Chris then paused for a bit and said very nervously. "You said and I quote 'I want to be your boyfriend'"

I froze, I actually told him, I told him how I felt, I told him that well... that I loved him, that I wanted to be his boyfriend.... I actually did... but, why didn't he want me to know?

"Why, why didn't you want to tell me" I asked. Chris looked down at the floor.

"I was scared that you didn't mean it" he admitted. "We were drunk, I was worried you only said it since you were drunk or that I remembered wrong since I was also drunk" Chris continued staring at the floor "I didn't want to lie to you but I was also scared to tell you the truth, if you didn't mean it I don't know what I'd do, I know this may sound stupid, especially since we're young but..." he took a deep breath. "I'm pretty sure I love you" my brain stopped working once he said that... he actually, genuinely loved me...

"Y-you love me" I asked trying to hide my excitement but failing badly at it. Chris looked at me and smiled.

"Yea, this may sound weird but, I've felt something between us since I first met you, It was like, an instant connection if that makes since" he explained. "You might not realize it but you've helped me a lot, I used to be a lot shyer and worried about being 'perfect' until I met you. I don't know what it is about you, and I probably never will but I love you."

"Are you- are you sure" I asked. "I mean, there's a lot about me that's well, weird... I have a really bad past, still have slight trust issues, ADHD, autism, my legs have scars from when I used to cut, I just, I dont get it". Chris sighed and held my hand. I looked at him and felt my face heat up.

"Karl, to me your perfect, so what if you had a bad past, just means you can stop people from making the same mistakes, so you have trust issues, just means you'll never trust the wrong person, you have adhd, just means your funner to joke around with and the autism  means when you understand and learn something, it's even more impressive". Chris then lightly rubbed my thigh with his other hand. "And so what if you used to cut, those scars are part of you and by never adding more, just means you left that part of your life behind". I felt tears running down my face from what he said. He looked at me and smiled. "No matter what you do, you say, of anything, I'll always love you... no matter what" I immediately hugged Chris while crying, I couldn't ask for anyone better...

"I love you, you idiot" I said burying my face into his shoulder after he pulled me onto his lap.

"I love you to" he said rubbing my back as I stayed there. Just in the nice silence, it felt peaceful, I felt something I've never felt before... I'm guessing this is what love is, and it's amazing....