Camp Guerre

Chapter 6

I woke panting, beads of sweat drenching my brow. My hands shook on their own accord, and I noticed the blanket that had been on me when I went to sleep was now arranged messily on the floor. I closed my eyes, breathing in deeply, trying to calm myself. The dream had happened once again, with the same details, the same feeling as if I had been there all over again. I shook the thought from my head. Remembering it when I was actually conscious would only do me more harm.

Unlike most people, I never woke up disorientated, even when I was in some place new. I remembered I was at Camp Guerre the instant my eyes sprang open, and that had been a normal reaction for me since I was small. My thoughts shifted slowly to the fact that, for as long as I've known anyone, I've been different. Different in many ways, some unpleasant, I thought, once again remembering the dream. I had to stop going back to that.

I lay still for a few moments until I was sure that my breathing had calmed, then I wiped my forehead with my pyjama sleeve before opening my eyes again. I had to make sure I was calm, I couldn't risk anyone seeing me so weak. I placed my hands on my sides, and after a moment, lifted myself up to a sitting position. The first thing I noticed was Jayd sitting on the stool just in front of my bed, watching me with wide eyes. I was shocked, but my reflexes quickly hid my emotion before she could even catch a glimpse of it. Maybe she had noticed me sweating, or worse yet, shaking. Her seeing me shaking could jeopardise everything. I swallowed hard, suddenly angry at her. How dare she just watch me while I was sleeping? Hasn't she ever heard of privacy?

"What are you doing, Jayd?" I practically screamed at her in frustration. I had to keep everything hidden, I couldn't let my defences down. I was angry she had nearly made me slip, angry at myself for even giving her that chance, "Why are you watching me?"

"I-I'm sorry. Y-you were s-screaming in your s-sleep" she stuttered, clearly shaken from my outburst. She inched back, trying to get further away from me. No doubt she remembered me with Augustus yesterday. But I didn't bother about that. She had heard me screaming?

My heart almost stopped as I sat, paralysed in fear. My emotions were masked to Jayd, but I was suddenly going through an internal turmoil. What if people had always been hearing me? What if someone found out? Why had I never realised before? I almost choked on my breath, but managed to stop and breathe normally. To anyone watching me it would seem as if I was just glaring at them, but that wasn't the only thing that was happening. I breathed again, calming myself further. Jayd didn't have to find out. I wouldn't let her. I could hide it, I had already succeeded all these years. Maybe it was a one-off, maybe I had never screamed before and would never scream again. I certainly hoped so.

Reasoning with myself seemed to work to make me believe I could keep it a secret, because I knew I could. But it didn't help the slightest with the anger I felt towards Jayd. She didn't know me, yet she was butting into my life. I didn't want some annoying, red-obsessed girl to even look at me, let alone watch me sleep.

"Just a nightmare, Jayd. What, you've never had one before?" I replied to her, the anger seeping out into my tone. I raised my eyebrow at her, watching her shrink back under my gaze.

"I- no. I mean, yes- yes I have... I-" Jayd stuttered, but came to a stop as soon as the door to our cabin burst open.

"Babes, the hunk has arrived!" the person introduced himself, smirking. From the mood I was in, I knew that if he came any closer I'd rip his throat. He was annoying as it was, but it seemed like subconsciously he could just pick out the worst situations he could be in and get there.

"Get out, Damen" I seethed, not wanting to look at his face any longer. The more time he spent here, the less time he would have till he was in his grave.