Learning To Love

chapter 44

"We're so close but so far!" I yelled , slamming the door as I got in my car.

Grayson got in the passenger and sighed, leaning into his seat.

"Fuck!" I punched the steering wheel in rage and the horn went off. "Maybe I should just fucking interigate him! Why the fuck wont he admit it! Why?" I ran my fingers through my hair, balling it up in my fists.

"Calm down Lucas, we'll get him. It's just a matter of time." Grayson put Ollie's drink in the cup holder and threw my keys which had fallen out of my pocket into the ignition.

"Let's go see how Ollie's check up went." I looked at him, feeling a rage boiling in my chest. It always amazed me how patient Grayson could be sometimes.

When we arrived at the hospital, I noticed Mason's black truck in the lot. I wondered if Ollie texted him or if they just visited randomly.

When we got up to Ollie's room, Ollie was sitting at the edge of his bed with Mason beside him and Cameron in front of him.

"There he is!" Ollie had a big smile that made my hard frown fade away.

"Did it go well?" It wasn't really a question.

"They took out the stitches! Helped me stretch my back all the way but the skin is still really tight. I'm on some new painkillers too." As I approached them, I noticed Mason had his arm slugged over Ollie's shoulders. It finally felt like everything was going back to normal.

"They said, if it wasn't for you, it'd probably take longer to heal." Ollie was smiling and vibrant, meanwhile I felt like a dark shadow.

"Really?" Mason asked, confused.

"Well, ya. Lucas has spent every minute of every day as my volunteer nurse." Mason's eyebrows raised and then he nodded his head.

"That awesome," Mason was careful as he took his arm off Ollie and stood up, stretching his back.

"We asked the woman at your work what your favourite coffee is, she gave us this," Gryason handed Ollie the cup of coffee and his eyes sparkled.

Taking a sip, he smiled. "Matilda definitely made it, she always adds too much sugar," chuckling, he chugged it back.

"Where else did you guys go?" Ollie asked casually, walking over to the window. It startled me how much better he looked.

"We just went for a drive to get some fresh air and listen to some music," Grayson said casually, leaning up against the wall, Fits deep in his pockets.

"I can't wait to play music again, man I miss it!" Ollie turned around and I noticed they wrapped his head bandage a little smaller, his hair looked poofy from it.

"What do you mean?" I asked, a little anxious at his urgency.

"Well, they said I'm good to be released in three days!" Ollie had an easy smile and seemed pleased but I glared at him. The air grew heavy and Grasyon sighed and looked at his phone.

"Hey guys, we will only have three hours to practise, we better get going now," Grayson nodded towards the door before making his way.

"Oh, yeah. Well, goodbye Ollie. Can't wait to see you again!" Cam waved before leaving the room.

Mason glanced between Ollie and I, but was nudged by Grayson to leave.

I hadn't moved an inch and when their footsteps had faded down the hall, Ollie finally spoke.

"So, what's your issue?" He looked away nonchalantly.

"I don't think you should go home yet." My voice was stern and I could tell Ollie didn't like it.

"Why's that?" Ollie's tone had an edge to it that I didn't like either.

"It's too soon, and what if the skin rips open again, and I'm not there. I was lucky enough to get you in just enough time, but I can't promise to save you every time," I warned and now Ollie glared at me.

He scoffed and finally turned to look at me with an uninterested look.

"Are you sure that's why? Or do you just like having control over me?" His words completely puzzled me and my brows pulled together.

"What?" I asked in disbelief.

"Admit it, you love having me like this so you can control everything I do, where I go, having me in the dark, lying to me about your job, what else are you lying to me about?" His voice leaked venom out like vaporised gasoline, it suffocated me.

"Ollie, are you even listening to yourself?" I walked towards him but he put his hand out to stop me.

"Drop the act Lucas, I know you don't actually like me, you're just confused. You can leave now, you don't have to burden yourself with my problems anymore. I'm not your little project to work on." He looked at me icily, and his words punctured me like glass.

Oh Ollie, you really are a fool if you'd think I'd give up that easily...

"You're pretty comical, you know?" I snickered and he glared at me with slitty eyes.

"I'm the one lying, keeping secrets, guiding you into the dark? Is that right?" I paced the floor, my arms crossed over my chest.

"Is that why you lie about your dad?" His jaw clenched.

"That's why you lied about your mother?" I raised my eyebrow.

"What the fuck do you know about my mother?" Ollie got up from leaning off the table by the window.

"I know you lied about how she died, or why." I approached him, looking down at him.

"I know she killed herself, and you found her. Did you ever plan on telling me that, or is that just one of the things you planned on hiding forever?"

"Don't you dare fucking talk about my mother! You don't know anything about me! I don't owe you shit!" I could see a tear welling up in his eye.

"Did you plan on telling me about your dad beating you, or is that another secret for yourself?" I got closer and closer to him, backing him into a corner.

"Your right Ollie, I dont know jack shit about you, yet I've been here every fucking minute anyway, knowing you've been fucking lying to me!" My voice was on the edge of yelling and Ollie wrapped his arms around himself.

"Admit it Ollie, Tell me the fucking truth!" Tears started spilling down his cheeks.

"Tell me what happened Ollie! Admit it!" He shook his head, his chest heaving.

"I told you!" He cried, looking at the ground.

This is wrong.

This isn't the way Lucas.

Find yourself.

Inhale.

Exhale.

"Whatever, keep lying then.'' I whispered and turned around, walking towards the door. My knees felt like they were about to collapse under me.

"Lucas..." Ollie's quivering voice whispered behind me. I stopped in the doorway.

"Please don't go."

I sighed, holding back my own tears.

Do what's right.

I turned around and walked straight back to him, his eyes were wet and agitated.

"I'm sorry I hurt you Ollie." I held him close to me and he cried into my chest.

"Stop being mean Lucas, stop hurting my feelings because you can't deal with your own."