The Boy From The Bridge - Jakehoon

Chapter 115: What Makes a good friend 3/7

Sunghoon felt his spine tingle in fear at Jake's declaration that he was a monster. 

Sunghoon loved Jake, idolised and adored him. He'd seen him as a pillar on which to build himself around. Sunghoon's constant attempts to better himself and grow were as much as effort to impress Jake as they were to keep up with and imitate him. 

Hearing him now, talk so openly to Jungkook's friend Jimin was difficult. The fears and doubts he was describing were the same ones he had tried, albeit unsuccessfully, to express to him and now Sunghoon wished he had taken the time to try and fully understand and reason with them. There was a feeling that worried Sunghoon, and it lingered in the pits of his stomach. The manifesting dread that was growing with each passing moment was unsettling. What if these feelings Jake was have couldn't be quelled. They were obviously real and genuine - in which case - what did that mean for them?

Despite this, Sunghoon clung to Jake - he had to, for better or for worse. "You're not a monster" Sunghoon murmured. It was meant to be a whisper but Sunghoon had the uneasy feeling that Jimin had heard the comment and noted it down in his little black book.

Sunghoon wasn't sold on Jungkook's friend. This man had appeared, seemingly from nowhere save somewhere from Jungkook's past and had begun trying to 'therapise' them. Exactly who Jimin was had never being explained and his line of questioning was currently drawing a pretty negative trajectory for his and Jake's relationship. 

"Enough" Sunghoon spoke more defiantly and turned to Jake, whose head not rested on his shoulder. "You are not a monster Jake - you're a boy, just like me, just like Jungwon, just like these two." Sunghoon nodded at Jungkook and Jimin, even though he knew Jake couldn't see, "You're not using people, you're acting like how anyone else would in your shoes. First and foremost we're your friends, we're there to be relied on. The fact that some of our supposed friends abandoned us back at school is not a reflection on you, or even me. It's a reflection on them."

"Sunghoon, I ran away from you last year - you had to come and get me remember. I do runaway, I do abandon." Jake replied. 

"You don't runaway and hide to save yourself, you do so to protect others, to protect me. Please don't start to beat yourself up over this it's not healthy and it isn't..."

"Jungwon?" Jimin cut Sunghoon off mid-sentence. Broadsided by both the rudeness and the abruptness of Jimin's question. Sunghoon was rendered silent for a moment. 

Jungwon, having had his name called, allowed his feline eyes to shoot up in the direction of Jimin. "Yes?" The youngest replied, unsure of how to respond and, Sunghoon supposed, having his own misgivings over Jimin too. 

"Why do you reckon you've come here?" Jimin asked his question was met, initially, by silence as the eyes of the four others turned in unison to regard Jungwon who was sat alone at one end of the seating arrangement where he had been quietly running his hands through the ruff of Artemis's neck. 

Sunghoon watched Jungwon think about how to answer it but as he watched, Sunghoon couldn't help but feel Jake's body push more and more heavily against him. Despite this increased pressure and weight, Sunghoon felt ready to buttress his friend. In an act of reassurance he began massaging Jake's right shoulder, bringing him in to share his warmth as they listened and waited for Jungwon's scrutinising to begin.

_______

Jay was nervous. He had pressed the buzzer for Sunghoon's apartment so many times over the years and he'd never had to think about it before. Today however, the buttons, 1-3-1 looked scary and his fingers didn't have the courage to press any of them. He hadn't really imagined what he was going to say to his friend, 'sorry' did feel substantive or meaty enough to carry any worthwhile weight given the circumstances.