Darkness into Light - Espresseleine

Chapter Eighteen ~ My Happiness is in Your Hands

Espresso tugged on the collar of his dress shirt as he looked around his new room anxiously. Madeleine had a pretty big guest room. In fact, he had a pretty big house. Because of course the almighty knight commander, the paladin who was worshipped and showered with love and adoration from his very birth, was wealthy.

He could tell by his position in the castle and the resemblance between the royal rulers and him, that he barely had to lift a finger to climb the ranks and gain popularity doing it. Everyone loves him. He has everything that Espresso has been longing for his entire life. People that care about him, acknowledge him and don't treat him like a worthless piece of garbage. His entire life, Espresso was practically invisible. He fought tooth and nail to get the recognition he deserved. He worked so hard to prove himself to his siblings.. to the Enchantress.
Every day he would be exhausting himself to work on his magic endurance. For God's sake, he's almost died once, just trying to please others in hopes they would give him an ounce of affection back. But they never did. So the worthless coffee mage had to continue living his life knowing that nobody loved him. Nobody cared whether he were to live or die.

But for some reason, Dark Enchantress still acts like she cares. She'd open her arms to the mage, manipulating the mage into believing that she cared. But in the end he was simply a pawn in her complex game of chess. She just wants to use him. She'd said so herself.

"Espresso, conserve your magic. You have not a single clue how valuable it is to me. You will be of great use, don't let me down."

But the mage still blindly clung to her, with the foolish hope bundled in his chest that she might change her mind one day and decide to cherish him like how Madeleine is cherished by the entire kingdom. That false hope, it's the reason he kept going.

Espresso sat down on the bed placed in the centre of his new temporary bedroom. It was an average sized bed, the sheets a nice cerulean blue.
Gross. He'd much rather a brown-ish colour like his sheets in his own bed back at his own bedroom. But it would have to do. The mage slowly crept onto the bed, the mattress sinking only slightly under the weight. He sat upright, legs dangling over the edge and sweeping the floorboards. He sighed, hugging around his middle.

I feel sick.

Supposedly, he was just suffering from homesickness. A common occurrence in this situation. He's never strayed away from the cookies of darkness's castle for more than merely a week. And it's very well been just over a month since he'd last been able to curl up on his own pillow and fall asleep to the creaking of his broken window and the soothing sounds of the night animals.

But this is what his life has come to, so he'll just have to adapt.

Because there's still a small amount of hope inside of him that if he is successful in this mission, Dark Enchantress will finally love him.

No. Something feels off..

Why is he still clinging to the hope that has long since been proven false?

Admit it Espresso. They will never give you the validation you crave.

Espresso hugged his touch starved self, regretting the moment he'd pushed himself away from the warmest hug he'd ever received in his life earlier in his old cell. The simple act of affection conducted by none other than the righteous knight commander himself. Madeleine.

The mage began to cry, hugging himself tighter as tears rolled down his cheeks. He wanted so badly to be hugged by him again. To be treated like he was the most important cookie on Earthbread. It was at that moment that he realised, everything that he'd ever wanted, Someone caring deeply for him and showing him unconditional love even if he knew what a monster he really was... over the past month, it had all been handed to him on a silver platter all along. Everything Madeleine has done for him..