Fallen

Chapter Forty-Four: From Ashes

Ash collapses on a bed, still covered in soot and smelling like fire. She is lucky that her room was in the part not caught on fire. After the flames were put out, tents were put up for those that couldn't find a room. Many were quickly built by those that were sent to the ground first. A skill they had picked up quickly. 

There is a knock at her door, causing her to let out a soft groan. What now? 

"Enter."

The door opens and Clarke slips in. Ash sits up quickly, allowing for there to be room for Clarke to sit. For some reason, Ash had the urge to push a stray hair out of Clarke's face. She doesn't, but odd she had the feeling to do so. 

"Were you about to go to bed dirty?" Clarke asks, chuckling a bit.

"I'm tired," Ash responds, running both hands down her face. "It's been a long day. Between the fire, the engagement, the almost wa-"

"Engagement?"

Shit. Did she say that out loud? She did not mean to tell Clarke about that yet.

"A political one," she cautiously tells her. She is trying to find the right words, but she can't. "Roan had proposed a possible union of the clans-"

"By you two getting married."

"What do you want me to say? At least it's Roan and not someone like Murphy."

That causes Clarke to let out a quick chuckle. "You had Murphy's name up and ready for that."

Ash lays back on the bed. "Just the first name that popped in my head."

"Well if you're comparing to Murphy, the bar is low."

"Especially since he wanted to kill me."

Clarke also lays back, the two just staring at the ceiling. "What are you going to tell the others?"

"I don't know. I really don't want to." She takes a deep breath, thinking. "Why does it feel like life was easier when we first arrived?"

"Cause it was. All we were trying to do was survive."

"No crazy AIs or worrying about the coalition."

"No Mount Weather."

"No drilling."

There was a moment of silence before Clarke asks, "Do you still hear it?"

"On occasion accompanied by the screams. Mainly when I'm asleep now."

"What was it like for you? When you took the Key."

"Quiet. No more intrusive thoughts. It was just peace. But also I had no control over what I did or said." There is soft sniffle. "I forgot them." Her voice cracks a bit. "I forgot my mom and everyone we lost. How could I do that?"

Clarke turns her head to face her. "You were trying to protect your father."

"You were trying to protect your mother and yet you didn't take it."

"Our situations are different."

Ash wipes away a few tears that are trying to escape her eyes.

"It's okay to cry. You been through a lot already."

"What good would it do?"

"It would help your mental health. Bottling it up can make it worse."

Ash lets out a long sigh, curling up into a ball.

"But it isn't fair. Everyone here has been through the same amount of stuff or more. So what makes it okay for me to cry while they can handle it?"

Clarke places her hand on Ash's cheek, causing her to look Clarke in the eye. 

"That's dumb logic," she tells her. Ash lets out a short, harsh laugh. 

"Your one to talk."

"Maybe you're right." Clarke stretches before standing up. Ash sits up on the bed. "If you need me, I'm just down the hall." 

With that, she leaves. Ash falls backwards, sprawling out on her bed. 

*****

Ash helps Roan get the last barrel onto the bed of the truck. They need to get every last bit of the rocket fuel to Raven. She apparently needs to get to space in order to finish the process to make the formula for Nightblood. Ten full barrels are loaded onto the truck. Hopefully it's enough. 

Clarke and Bellamy walk over to join them. There are a couple of Azgeda warriors and Arkadia guards that will join. Everyone piles into either the truck or the rover. Ash rides on the back of the truck. She doesn't want to be in the same vehicle as her ex and her fiancé. They ride out of the safety of the compound and towards the lab.

She bounces up and down due to the bumpy road. She lurches some as the truck comes to an abrupt stop. Standing up, Ash can see that Trikru members had stopped the rover. There are a few sick members with them. Clarke and Bellamy get out of the rover. Ash hops off the bed of the truck and walk over to them.

"Is everything alright?" she asks the group. 

"We are gathering for a strike against Azgeda," one of the younger males tell her. "Will Skaikru stand with us?"

"We can't at the moment," Ash quickly responds. "There was a fire at Arkadia, so we're struggling with trying to get everything dealt with." She looks at the sick members. "I don't think all of your people would be able to handle a fight right now also."

"We're victims of an Ice Nation attack."

"We're in a hurry," Clarke informs him, "but I think we could spare a couple people to help all of you. We'll radio them so they know you're coming."

"Thank you," he tells her. He motions for the group to go towards Arkadia. Ash starts heading back to the truck. As she swings herself onto the bed, she hears a young boy call out. Shit! No one had saw him go behind the rover. 

"Azgeda!" he calls out.

"Go!" Ash screams, holding onto the hood of the truck as it lurches forward. The rover and truck start speeding off. Ash ducks to avoid arrows hitting her. Soon the vehicles leave the Trikru behind. Ash struggles to keep her balance as the truck rides down the road, but she checks the barrels. All of them are fine. After a little bit, the vehicles stop. Everyone jumps out of the vehicles to see the path is blocked by a broken tree.

"Why didn't you fire back at them?" an Azgedian warrior yells at Ash.

"They were scared," Ash snaps back. "Your nation invaded them!"

The warrior goes for his sword, but Roan grabs his shoulder to stop him. 

"That's enough," he orders. "I will look for another path upstream. Don't be an idiot."

"Are you trying to protect this girl from me?"

"I'm protecting you from 'this girl'."

Clarke walks over.

"You should take Bellamy with you," she tells him. "And use the rover."

Roan agrees before going over to the rover. Ash pulls Clarke away a bit.

"What the fuck?" she whisper yells. "You put those two together?"

Clarke's eyes widen as she realizes her mistake.

"Shit, I'm didn't think about it."

"Ash!" Bellamy calls out. "Are you coming?"

Ash looks at Clarke, panicking a bit.

"Did you volunteer me as well?"

"I didn't," Clarke promises. She grabs Ash's hand. "I swear."

She lets out a shaky breath before nodding her head. "Okay. I believe you." She looks over where Bellamy and Roan are standing. "I'm coming."

Her and Clarke lets go of each other before Ash head over to the rover.