thoughts.

v i n t e - e - t r ê s ( e n g l i s h )

to baby j

end of march of 2022

it's an inexplicable feeling, that one of realizing that the person you're with is, in fact, the one. in just a matter of days, we'll be celebrating our 5th year together. it seems crazy, just yesterday we were just a couple of teenagers, hopelessly tired of not being liked back, that started talking via text messages about everything and nothing at all. i was heartbroken, committed to forget about boys and focus on self love, but you appeared out of nowhere and, in the most strange of circumstances, we fell in love. and now, i can only hope that you won't get sick of me and want to spend the rest of your life with me. because now, either we get married or it'll be the worst breakup of my life.
these past few years (the pandemic ones) were the ones that i felt we grew closer together. even when we were far from each other, spending two months just seeing your face through a screen, we reached a step of intimacy that we haven't got before. it's really crazy how, even after almost 5 years, i still get butterflies all over my stomach and you still make me laugh, i think now i laugh harder than ever.
the way that you always rush to my side whenever i'm feeling down, how you always, unconditionally, defend me, without having second thoughts. i was so heartbroken before i met you, i've never felt pretty or attractive before you.

beginning of april 2022

i've been recounting the days as they happened 5 years ago. when you came to my house to help me film a project for english class, and we flirted so much with each other! we had been talking through text messages in that past month, and you promised me a hug, but you didn't give me one that day. the next day, you finally admitted to your best friend that you, in fact, liked me back. you have no idea how happy i was. to have been so heartbroken for the entirety of my teen years and then to find someone who actually had feelings for me. the following day, i was hoping for you to tell me you liked me. that didn't happen, but still we spend the entire day trying to be together in between classes.
and then, my favorite day of my life. everything was so simple, maybe it happened a little bit too fast, but i wouldn't have it any other way. it's been 5 years since that day but my heart still flutters whenever i think about it. to think how we grew up, how we changed so much but we still stayed together. so many other couples who we knew at the time have broke up, but you still want to spend every minute of everyday with me.
happy 5 years, my love. ich liebe dich.