(trigger warning: this chapter will mention sexual assault and abuse)
𝙇𝙪𝙣𝙖'𝙨 𝙋𝙤𝙫
"Have you tried talking to him?" My therapist Ellie asks me.
I sit across from her as I look down and fiddle with my hands.
I talked to Jax a couple weeks ago and decided that I should see a therapist after everything that's happened. Asher's also seeing a therapist as well, he said he likes her a lot.
"I've tried, it's just-every time I try and tell him my throat dries up and I can't move." I say.
"And why is that?" Ellie asks as she writes some things down on her notepad.
"I don't fucking know, if I did I wouldn't be here." I spit out.
"You're angry." She states.
"Of course I'm fucking angry! What happened to me was outside of my control and that fucker is still in the back of my head telling me that once I tell Jax what happened he'll look at me differently, look at me with disgust."
"Why don't you start by telling the other people in your life first? Work your way up." She says.
"But that's not fair." I mumble.
"Why not?"
"Because what happened to me doesn't only affect me, it affects him as well. What does it say about me if I tell everyone else before him."
"This is your story to tell, your trauma. Other people don't get to feel a certain way by how you deal with it and who you tell it to. And by the way you've described Jax, that man could never be mad at you, or look at you with disgust." She smiles.
"But what if he does?"
"Then fuck him, not physically, but fuck him."
I can't help but laugh at her words.
"Looks like that's all the time for today." She says as we both stand up. "See you next week Luna."
"Bye Ellie." I say as I leave the room and make my way out to meet Jax.
"How was it?" He asks as he pulls me into a hug.
"Good, I like her." I say as I look up at him.
He offers me a smile.
"Mommy look what I got." Asher says as he jumps off the chair behind Jax and I. "After me and Mrs.Taylor talked, she let me pick out a toy." He says showing me a toy car.
"Wow, that's a very nice car you got there." I say as I pick him up.
"I'm gonna get a real one when I'm older." He says with a firm nod.
"I'm sure you are buddy." Jax says as the three of us make our way outside to the car.
I open the door to the backseat and place Asher in his booster seat, buckling him in before I place a kiss on his cheek. After that I make my way into the passenger seat, Jax turning on the car and making our way back home.
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𝘽𝙚𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙛𝙪𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙒𝙧𝙚𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙙
Romance"Why would you do that for me? We barely know each other?" I say barely above a whisper. "Because I think you're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen." He with complete honesty lacing his voice. His beautiful brown eyes bore into mine as if it w...
