A/N: Apologies for the kind of digression. I was testing some waters. It failed. I'm going to try and stick to the writing method I've only recently found.
It was morning. The sun filtered through the crack in the curtains. Today was warmer than usual. Yao sat up in bed. Today she would return to China. She knew she couldn't return to his usual home. Instead she was going to go to her 'War home'
It is a small place in the poorest part of China. It was made of the strongest steel. It had everything you could possibly need for a war. It could almost be ready for a zombie apocalypse. None of her younger siblings would be there. She refused to let them help. She didn't want to get them involved. She couldn't risk them getting hurt. Or worse, dead.
Last night, Ivan's little sister came to visit. Yao was in bed by then. She left later. Natalia had allied with the Nordics. Anything to get her older brother to love her. She wanted everything in the way gone.
Ivan came in with a tray in his hands. He brought up breakfast. His beaming face lit up the room. He place the tray on a bedside table and sat on the bed.
"Good morning!"
His hand went to the bump.
"Good morning to you too!"
Yao couldn't help but smile. She wished that she could stay here. She knew she couldn't. The Nordics have this thing about cold weather. They're used to it. His country is warmer.
It was getting warmer. Yao could feel it. She ignored it. It was probably Ivan turning the heating up for her. Her. Yao was having a hard time adjusting to it. She spent nearly her entire life known as a man. Now, it was different. The curse wasn't going to lift. Not anytime soon.
Yao was due to leave this afternoon. She thought about how much she'd miss this place. The people in it. She knew that she didn't have to worry about being lonely. Toris would visit every other week. The Lithuanian would visit with a pile of things to do. Ivan would visit every day. She had nothing to worry about.
Their lips found each other and all anxieties left each person. All panic was gone. It was just them in the world. Nothing else existed. Nothing else mattered. When they both pulled away, all the feelings that were vanished, returned. The heat turned into a slight burning.
"I'll leave you to your breakfast. Da?"
With that, Ivan got up and left. He hated having to do this. Unfortunately it was for the best. At least this way, she was safe.
In the time alone, he managed to clear a path for Yao to get through. He was proud of his work. He then went inside. Sometimes the weather was too much for even him to handle. That's why he has a bottle of vodka with him. He keeps one at home for special occasions.
When Ivan came back in, Yao was getting dressed. She was putting on a black dress. The faint war scars were all over her back. That wasn't what made the Russian stare. Ivan couldn't help but notice the large blisters on her right wrist. The skin was a flaming red. Was that there before? He didn't recall it being there. Perhaps it was and he didn't notice? Unlikely but possible. Highly unlikely. Yet still possible. He decided not to bring it up just yet. Now would be a bad time. Perhaps when they are on their way.
When he was sure that Yao was finished, he decided to pick her up and swing her around in his arms. He scooped her up gently. He was half worried about the reaction he would get.
"Aiyaa! How long have you been there?! You didn't see anything?!"
Yao could feel herself blushing. Ivan knew what she meant by what he said. His wrist. He couldn't be honest about it, especially when he had no idea how it got there.
"Nyet. I didn't. I just came in a few seconds ago. "
Of course, nobody wanted to see her go but it's not like they have a choice. It would be safer. She stepped outside and gave a huge sigh. The burning was getting more intense. The cold air almost her salvation. The snowflakes melting upon contact with her sleeve. Ivan noticed this but didn't say anything.
An hour passed and they were halfway to the Russian border.
"So... What was your childhood like?"
Yao thought about that for a while.
"I was only child. I was ruò. At least that's what Fùqīn says. I don't remember faces. Or names. Just pain. He left Mǔqīn. I was left at doorstep. It not exactly place I want to go back to. "
She hated her childhood. Like all countries, she doesn't remember her parents. Only the words her parents often uttered. She was raised by Mongols. Barbarians known for killing. She learnt to fight the hard way. She was placed with trained fighters. It was supposedly 'entertainment' for Genghis Kahn. The blood spilt never truly left. It never would. Just as the scars would never go. They went too deep.
When they got to the Russian border, they crossed over. Yao's arm was agony. When she looked up, she realised why.
Baby, I'm holding on dear. This heart, it is a waxwork of echoes.Warm my heart, set my hands on fire.Hair on fire, dress on fire. Oh I'm an angel, an angel on fire and I'm burning to escape the cold
The smell was the most disturbing part. Melted flesh and clothes. Burnt hair. The smoke was enough to choke even the toughest of people. It brought tears to Yao's eyes. Her home. Her people. She had failed. Where was she? She should have been here.
Haunted, I'm swimming in the Dead Sea.Try as I may to shine in the darkness.Warm my heart, set my hands on fire
Hair on fire, dress on fire. Ooh I'm an angel, an angel on fire and I'm burning to escape the cold. To escape the cold.
To escape the cold. Yao was feeling anger. At herself. For not being there when they needed her the most. Her Fùqīn was right. She was ruò. She was weak.
Finally finished! Let me know what you think! Last song I promise! It just went with it! Anthony and The Johnsons - Angel on Fire. Translation notes. Fùqīn: Father. Mûquīn: Mother. Ruò: Weak. :D
