#7 - Sanitized

Inkantation

I was sent flying off the elevator.

Down. 

Down.

Down.

Down.

And then I hit the ground.

Am I dead?

No.

Not yet.

I need to make it to the surface.

And so when Three came crashing down, with the same blank, Sanitized eyes, I was ready.

Or, at least, I thought I was. Because the moment she touched the ground, she'd already almost killed me. More Splashdowns, I thought. I fired at her, but I only broke one of her many shields.

She retreated to her UFO, which had floated down from the elevator. I glanced at it and noticed that Cuttlefish was on it again, but since the ropes had broken, he'd been trapped in a ring of Sanitized ink.

Suddenly, an Autobomb flew by. Oh no...she had an Autobomb launcher. But as I chipped away at her health, I noticed that her eyes were starting to flicker back to blue, their normal color. I also noticed that Cuttlefish was...tapping at his SquidPhone!? Seriously?

But then, a very familiar song started blaring through the Kamabo speakers. "Check it out, Eight! Marina hacked into Kamabo's speakers!" It was true, the Calamari Inkanatation had replaced whichever song was playing before (Which I think was called Salty, but that doesn't matter.), and now the tip of one of Three's tentacles was fading to orange. Her eyes flickered back to blue again, and for a second, I thought that they would stay that way. But they switched back to cyan, and Three attacked me again (Although I did notice that she was having trouble using her specials). 

And then, for a solid eight seconds, when her tentacle color had almost turned halfway normal, her eyes flickered blue. "E-Eight...I can't..." Her eyes flickered for a second, and then they stayed on cyan. Her breathing was heavy, but the Telephone was ready to push her to her very limit, even if she would die. She smiled and ran at me, charged Booyah Bomb in hand. 

I barely had enough time to dodge, and somehow I did. But now there was Sanitized ink all over me, and there was this moment when I could almost hear the ink calling out to me, to give up and succumb to the same fate as all the others...all the Octarians...all the Octolings...Agent 3...Ahato...

Who was Ahato?

My mind snapped back to reality. Maybe it was the Calamari Inkantation, or maybe it was the familiar yet unrecognizable name, Ahato, that made me hold on to my sanity, but I knew that I could never give up. Agent 3-no, the Telephone, would fight hard, but I would fight harder.

Three's eyes flickered back and forth from Sanitized to blue, and I saw that her tentacles were almost normal colored. "Eight...the ink..." Then her eyes flickered back to cyan, and I saw that she had some canned specials in her hand. 

"I'm sorry, Telephone, but you're not gonna win today!"

I tossed a Splat Bomb at her and broke her last shield, causing her Hero Headset to fly off. I grabbed onto the edge of the UFO and inked over the Sanitized ink. Then, I took Agent 3 (Who was in her Squid form, and unconscious)'s weapon and put her in a ring of my own ink. 

The UFO floated back to the elevator. And then, finally, the moment I had been waiting for.

It was very early, and the sun was still rising, but it was a beautiful sight compared to the dullness of the Octarian domes and Kamabo Co.

But something was wrong.

But then, Pearl and Marina showed up in helicopters, wiping my worries away. Or, at least, until a giant statue rose out of the sea.

"Um...are you guys seeing this?" Asked Marina.

Pearl and Cuttlefish looked up. "What...is...that?!" Pearl stared at the statue.

"That form...but they were said to have been destroyed so long ago. It's...HUMAN!" Cuttlefish exclaimed.

Wait. THE TELEPHONE WAS CONTROLLING IT.

"TARTAR IN DA HOUSE! [DISABLING CONTEMPORARY SPEECH MODE]

"I am Tartar, an AI constructed 12,000 years ago by a brilliant professor. My prime directive is to pass on humanity's vast knowledge on to the next worthy lifeform. When your kind became self-aware, I had hoped that my long wait was finally over. But as I observed your evolution, I was DISGUSTED!"

"Well, you don't look so good either with that green slime on your head!" Pearl yelled.

Tartar didn't hear her.

"You wage war over minor genetic deviations. You obsess over trivial fashion choices."

"What trivi- OHMYCOD. Does he NOT know what pop culture is!?

"Shh, Pearl. Let the stupid phone talk," Said Marina.

Tartar went on. "And so I created a new prime directive: destroy this world and start anew! From the best and brightest test subjects, I created a sludge of supreme DNA."

"UGH! YOU'RE COVERED IN...BLENDED OCTOS!?" Pearl shrieked.

I could tell that Marina and Cuttlefish were thinking the same thing.

"...a primordial ooze from which the ultimate lifeform will emerge. Today is the day my vision becomes reality, as I destroy Inkopolis and everyone in it!"

The statue's mouth opened to reveal a giant ink gun full of Sanitized ink. "Yo...what the heck is that?!" Pearl asked. "Gimme a sec...I'm analyzing it," Said Marina. "I'm picking up a massive amount of energy coming from the statue,"

"Uh...that doesn't sound good,"

"So, yeah...the statue is charging up enough energy to destroy the world,"

"HOW DO WE STOP IT?!"

For the next minute, we went over the plan. Marina would activate her Hyperbombs, and I would manually detonate them. Off the Hook would sing so that Pearl could warm up her vocal chords and hit the statue with an energy beam.

I detonated the first five Hyperbombs. And then the five after that. And then more. And more. Until all of them had been detonated.

Pearl pulled out her Killer Wail and aimed it at the statue. 

"BOOYAH!"

----------------------------

After that, there was a blur of hugs, "WE DID IT!"s, and tears of joy. 

Agent 3 sat up, confused. But then she smiled at me. "Thank you..."