Disconnected ; Lashton

5. Unsung

When I wake up in the morning for school, I don't feel sick or very nervous at all. Actually, I feel excited.
I'm happy to go to school. Never in a million years would I think that'd ever happen. Guess I have Ashton to thank for that one.

Ashton and his cute smile, his dimples. His eyes, and his slightly wavy hair. It looks soft.

I stop thinking about Ashton's hair and get out of my bed but my feet are all tangled in the sheets and I almost fall flat on my face. I save my top half but my knees slam onto the hardwood floor and not too long after my mum comes rushing in.

"Are you okay? Luke!" She helps me up and sits me back down on my bed. The fall was harder than I thought because one of my knees is scraped and the other has a small spot of blood forming on it. Great way to start my day, aye?

Whilst my mum runs out of my room for the first aid kit, I spot the wristband Ashton gave me yesterday sitting on my nightstand. I reach for it and put it back on under my long sleeved pajama shirt. My mum comes back in and leans down to me without a word. I reach for the first aid kit in her hands to try and tell her that I can handle it myself but she's not having it.

"I'm your mum, I'll take care of you!" She insists. I grit my teeth when she puts alcohol on the knee with the cut. Then she places a band-aid over it and stands back up.

"All better! Now, how often am I always telling you to be careful? You can be very clumsy sometimes." I give her a sorry look and she smiles warmly at me to show she's not mad.
As I'm getting ready in the bathroom, I think about how upset she got when she saw me on the floor. If she gets that distraught over me scraping my knees, then I can't even begin to imagine how she'd react if she ever saw my arms. The thought makes my stomach turn with guilt, but it's fine. It's fine because she won't ever find out, so that won't happen.

As I get dressed in the mirror, I look at the band-aid on my knee. If I wear skinny jeans over it, it'll just come off, but I don't want fabric rubbing on the cut, even if it's small. I put on my jeans with holes on the knees so the problem is solved. It isn't exactly cold outside, but I put my leather jacket on anyway.

I'm watching the clock on the wall tick in my third period, waiting for it to be time for lunch, when I think I see someone looking at me. I look back, and a girl a few seats in front of me is staring. Why is she staring? Can she tell that I'm... uh, different than the other boys? Please, don't let it be that.

I calm down when she smiles at me, and I want to be polite so I smile back. She turns to the girl next to her who I realize is looking at me too and they giggle to one another. What's that all about? Do they know? No, calm down Luke, how would they know? My face is still a little girly, but the rest of me shouldn't give it away. My voice wouldn't give it away since it's not super high and I don't talk in the first place. Why are they smiling at me and giggling like that? I adjust myself in my seat, hoping that they don't see how nervous I am. They look back at me again and I make eye contact with the first girl for a split second before the bell rings and I hurry out of the classroom. Saved by the bell, that was getting uncomfortable quickly.

I'm about to step into the canteen but I remember what happened yesterday and I hesitate. I don't want to go in there, someone save me.

"Luke!" My savior is here, thank god for Ashton. I spin around to face him and he stops in front of me.

"Michael and Calum ordered Nandos during third and snuck it in through a gate in the parking lot! C'mon, no crummy school food for us today, we're eating good!" I walk beside him away from the canteen. As we walk together he looks me up and down.

"Cool jacket, mate." I smile at his compliment. We arrive at the same table from yesterday and Michael jumps up on his seat as we come into view.

"Yes, the lads have arrived!" He sits back down and Calum is silently laughing next to him. I've noticed that Calum tends to laugh over every single thing Michael does. I guess they really are best friends. Ashton and I sit down next to each other and the sight of three people sitting at a table with me for lunch makes me overwhelmingly excited. If I was alone right now, I'd be kicking my feet. Obviously I'm not going to do that in front of them, so I settle on bouncing my leg instead. I've never sat with a group of people for lunch before, so I know this interaction is normal for them, but to me this is a big deal.