Teach Me (BaekYeol Fanfic)

Chapter 20

Chanyeol's View

I walked like a living corpse in the hallway who's trying to force a smile. Why am I even trying to smile? I feel so broke inside and out. I've been crying all night because of yesterday and damn, it still hurts. It hurts. So much. I don't know what to do. It felt like I've been stabbed but I think this is more painful. I want to breakdown right here and right now in this hallway if not for the people who was watching. The cries and sobs I let out last night weren't enough to even ease a little bit of this pain I'm currently feeling. I felt like dying already.

I reached the classroom safely. Geez, good thing nothing happened between my walks. I could've fainted or even died while I was walking. Every step I take felt like I'm going to hell. I'll have to face him today but as a teacher. I want to see him if he's fine or did he even go home safely after I left him. But why do I even worry? It felt unfair because I was the one who was hurt and I was also the one who worries. I wonder if he also cried or he spent the night without sleep. But what was I thinking?

I went in and found my friends in their usual places. I quietly went to them, gave them my fake smile and sat in my seat. "So, what's up guys?" I asked, trying not to make my voice falter but I failed.

All of them started to give me worried faces as I tried my best to act like confused. But of course I know them, it was obvious on my face that I'm not okay. Eyes droopy, cheeks puff and a gloomy aura to top that.

"You're not okay, hyung," Jongin stated. Everyone of them nodded and I can't help but to drop my fake smile and slump. And after that, breakdown. Shit. I feel like a girl already. But it hurts and no one cares.

"What happened, Chanyeol?" Junmyeon asked worriedly.

I was thinking of denying but there's no point, anyway. I need help, I need someone who could comfort me. I need them now. "I-I'm hurt." My voice depicted agony and sadness, and I can't help but to cry harder. I wiped off my tears by my hands and hid my face on the chair. The students around me had saw me crying and I don't want them to see me like this. They'll probably have a new headline in the school's newspaper: The very Park Chanyeol, brokenhearted? Gross. But what can I do? I felt like breaking down and it's not like they can stop me.

Moments later of sulking in the chair, I could hear the shuffling of the chairs and the greets of the students but this time, it seemed different. It seemed like they didn't greet Mr. Byun. I started to look up and that's when I realized that we have a new teacher. And that made me clench my fist. How can he do this? He's done too much. I just can't anymore.

I stood up and hurriedly went out the room. I need to breathe. I don't like it there. I ran and ran in the campus, trying to find any release of this anger, sadness, agony, and hurt inside of me. I don't know what to do. I don't care if I'm going to have a detention. I just want to do something.

I felt tiredness linger in me and I panted to a stop. I felt my knees weak and I know I need to find something I could sit within this empty hallway but I found none so I just sat near a wall. I covered my face with my knees and can't help but to cry in there. "Baek... hyun.." I can't help but to tremble. Flashbacks from the park came flashing through my mind. It seems like deja vu but right now it's different because Baekhyun isn't going to be here. I've got nothing to wait for. There's no worth anymore.

I cried harder hoping Baekhyun could hear my agony but I know he can't. Why is he doing this? He told me he loves me. What's wrong with loving someone like me? Am I not enough already?

I suddenly heard footsteps coming near me and I tried to lessen down my sobs but I failed. I just hugged my knees tighter. Please don't go near me but that didn't happen because I could feel that the footsteps stopped in front of me and the person was already sitting next to me. I slowly looked at the person next to me and it was the person that I least expected.