Blinding Sights

notice me

I remember it being painful. Loving her was painful. In some sort of way, it was the good kind of pain. I think in a lot of ways love is like that. It's never a perfect, it's messy. As cliche as it sounds, it nothing but the truth. Loving her was never simple, it probably why it was so intoxicating.

"Y/N" My roommate calls me as my mind goes drifting off. As i'm reading a book, not focused on what i'm reading. "Whaat Nicole?" I say with a pout on my face. "Okay why are you giving me attitude?" she says. "Im sorry it's just, starting the new school year is making my head race."  I say slightly rolling my eyes to myself.

Starting my Junior year of college at NYU made me nervous especially after everything that happened last year.

"Hey!" Nicole says. I keep my head down. "HEY!" she says louder. I look up to her with an annoyed face. "You can't do that to yourself." she says. "I know" I sigh.  "It's just although I know I'm a good student, my anxiety gets the best of me." I say twisting my lips. "Never apologize for something you don't have control of, you have every right to feel whatever you want to feel, buuutt that doesn't mean i'm going to let you drown in your thoughts". she says with a small smile on her face. "Thank you". I say with a genuine smile. "Come on, let's go". she says with a smirk on her face as she's getting off her bed, walking up to my bed. I look up at her with a confused look on my face. "Do not give me that look" she says as she rolls her eyes. I smile and grab the hand she was holding out, with no idea of what she has planned for us.

"Where are we going?" I ask as we head into the elevator. "It's a surprise". She says teasingly. "Dude you know I hate surprises". I tell her with an unamused face. "Come onnn!" Nicole says as she drags me out of the elevator. We begin walking around the city. I fidget having no idea of the events of tonight.

"Surprise!" she says as we walk towards an entrance with a line, holding up tickets to Fleetwood Mac. My jaw drops. "YOU BITCH!" I yell. She looks at me with her jaw slightly opened and an offended look on her face. "THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!" I yell at her as I pull her in for a hug, giving her kisses all over her face. She giggles at my childish behavior. "You're welcome, you little shit!" Nicole says as she winks at me. We both start laughing as we walk into the venue.

"Let's get drinks?" I ask Nicole. "You read my mind!" she says happily. "Margs?" I say with a smirk. "No seriously you read my mind" she says as we both giggle. We head over to the bar to get some drinks.

"Don't thank me by the way". She says. "Whatever do you mean?" I say confused. "Don't be mad."  She says with a guilty look. "Nicole Williams, what did you do" I ask with a firm voice. "Okay okay, Ethan got us the tickets." She says as she looks at me with a guilty face. "Oh" I say, taken by surprise. "Why would I be mad?" I tell her with a low voice. "I dunno, maybe because of what happened last year." She says as if she's scared to offend me.

"I hurt him, remember." I tell her. with a frown on my face. "You both hurt each other" She says with a comforting smile. How does she always know what to say?  "Oh yeah I also forgot to mention he might be around" she says. "Figured" I say. She gives me a soft smile as we begin to walk to where we are assigned. I look around not being able to keep still.

Fleetwood Mac has always had a place in my heart. Growing up my dad would always play it when we would go out on boat rides, or at our family barbecue's, or even when he would drive me and my older brothers to school. Any time I remember it, it was full of laughter and joy. I try not to think about it anymore after what happened with Sammy, my older brother.

Fleetwood Mac was one of the things I liked about Ethan. His love for music. Him and I met my freshman year of college. He was the intriguing kind of soul. The life of the party as they say. The type of person who doesn't have a mean bone in their body. I always respected him for it and for some reason I couldn't love him for it. After what happened with Asher, my twin brother. After their incident. I couldn't let myself be with Ethan. So I decided to let him go. It was for the best.