And Then The Murders Began

Chapter Thirty-Four: So Overdue, I Owe Them

"Electra! Electra!"

I'm hearing things, I'm dead, is this the afterlife... not what I expected, must be I'm in hell if whoever's in power up there sends me to some gloomy dungeon... what the hell... I guess I deserve it, no puns intended...

I look up, and the shackles and collar are gone, I'm definitely dead if that's the case, that's the only way that those people in that courtroom would have let me go, dump my body, I'm definitely dead, there's no real way to explain it, I've gotta be.

-and then I look around and I see Miguel's body and I wanna retch, did I really eat him but I'm looking and he's ripped up and torn to shreds but he's dead and not eaten and was it all in my head, oh gods, was it... or is this the flash of life before my heart gives out because of all the drugs that they put me on, is this the near-death flash and soon enough I'll be gone a la Owl Creek Bridge, is my heart about to stop and my brain's just winding its way down in those last few milliseconds before this is the end, hold your breath and count to ten...

I've drowned, or I've fried, and I can't tell if this is what's real or if I'm dead and I've dreamed the moment and I have literally hundredths of a second before I leave this planet for real because time's slowed down to a crawl...

If this is me about to die, then at least I'm at peace before I go to hell...

"Electra! Electra!"

There's that voice again, and I can't tell where it's coming from, I'm face down on the cold ground and my nose hurts and I'm trying to stand up and everything's woosy, like I just joined my uncle for a few too many gin and tonics... bleah, never been a fan of those, too piney... and heaven knows that I've been doing far far far too much pining after people to be needing to add even more pine into my life...

If I'm alive after all of that, if it was all just a dream then I need to get myself checked out by a doctor, and-

-there's a scrabbling of nails on concrete and I look up and there are some wolves coming for us, guns drawn and my arms fling themselves above my head without my even willing and, following suit, my knees do too and I can't shut my mouth, shut my brain off before it's pleading for mercy and to not be killed and forcing all of those words out of my mouth before I can stop them... come on, I know the power that my mind has over me, all that fear and anxiety and everything else that's basically shaped who I am-

-it seriously sucks, by the way, to have to repeatedly realise that your personality is comprised of nothing more than anxiety and trauma responses... not fun, zero- no, negative stars out of ten, absolutely do NOT fucking recommend.

The wolves come flying at us, guns drawn and fingers on triggers and they're ready to either kill us outright or have someone else do their dirty work when they catch sight of the mess that I am and they all stop and stare, and I don't know why they're looking at me like that...?

I mean, most of them appear to be male, have they just not seen a woman before or something, is that it? Do I look to them like I'd be a nice snack, or is there something else going on? Are they about to kill me because I killed one of their high men on the totem pole?

(side note the low people on the totem pole were actually the most important people and they got carved first but who's grading for historical accuracy here, not me)

On second though they're almost definitely about to kill me, so yeah all of this is super super fun... after the dream that I just had, actually dying- and let me just check here to see that this is the real life and not fantasy- pinch, ow that hurt for real yep definitely not dreaming this time-

-and then they get closer and they're all surrounding me like walls, and maybe I'd be able to take one of them down but I've barely eaten anything in quite some time and my head is pounding and I've really got to use the bathroom but I'm not about to do that down here and it's not like I've got anything that I can throw at them besides myself, and I don't think that that would really do all that much lasting damage...