He Only Married Me For Revenge

Chapter 57: Sharing their past

"Well.. how would I start this? Uhm.. I am an illegitimate child."

His mouth fell open, I know he wants to say something but he remained quiet so I continued my story.

"I know my Mom already told you, about her not being a Davis not like me. It's because I was born out of marriage. My father has his own family when he and my Mom got into a relationship, and then I came. And remember I told you about my siblings? They were just my half brother and a half-sister."

I sighed as I remember them... I missed them so much...

"I was ten years old when I found out the truth about my Mom and my father's relationship. I was so happy before then. I thought I have a complete family, with my Mom, my Dad and my siblings who's both older than me. But when I reached the age of ten, I started to ask some questions about our situations."

"I thought we're family? And when you say 'family' meaning they all live in the same roof. But why does my Dad and both brother and sister needs to go home every afternoon.. or every time they visit us home? I always asked Mom about it, but she just keep on changing the topic when it comes to that question."

"And then I learned to use the internet. Facebook, youtube, google, and I searched for my Dad's name in facebook. And then it boom! I found out that we're just his second family. That he's married and my mother was just his second woman. That we're just his second option."

I can feel some hot tears forming in my eyes. All my life.. we never came first, we're just a second family, I was just a child on the second wife.. but until now.. I am still a second option, my heart personally choose to be just a second choice.

No.. wrong! I wasn't a second choice, because I'm not even listed from one of his choices... But yeah, I remember.. I once became his first.. 'his first back up' to his revenge plan.. At least I experienced to become first...

"I was bullied after that.. in school, by our neighbors and all those who knew our family's story. They called my Mom a lot of names. A slut, a bitch, a plague in the society, and whatever harsh words they want to call her. And about me.. I became their favorite pet in everywhere. They always shouted.. 'Hey, Madi! The illegitimate child, the second family, the second option!'.."

"And because of that, I wanted to prove to myself that they were wrong! That I can be a first! I tried to participate in sports, and in that... I brought my Mom a new name.. 'The mother of the champion'... I became first! I became the champion! And even in school, I always make sure I remained on top."

I wiped the hot fluids that are now running down on my face. He shifted himself closer to me and hold my both hands.

"But you are now the champion, Madi. No matter what they say, you will be our champion, you're number one for us. And you already proved that to them that you're not just a second option or a choice."

He said looking to my eyes, but it just brought me more tears and a deep ache to my heart.

-'Yeah, I already proved that to them, but not in you. Because in whatever I do... I will be just a second choice to you. I can never be your first, not now or ever..'- my heart silently muttered while still in closed eyes.

"But you know what.. no matter what they did or say to us, I never felt mad or angry with my Mom. Because I know the only wrong thing that she did was to fall in love. To fall in love with the wrong person and in the wrong situation. But it's different with my Dad. I never talked to him after that. It just really hurts to know, that the man you're looking up to.. was the same man who would also break your little heart and your little dream."

"When all I wanted in life is to have a complete family... but then I realized, it will never happen."

The moment I finished speaking, he pulled me into a hug and kissed me on top of my head.