Love is Electric- joe and dianne one shots

bitter sweet

⚠️mentions of infertility⚠️

"What time are we leaving?"
Diannes faded Australian accent echoed through the countryside house. A few seconds later, joe, her now husband appeared in the door way of their bedroom.

"Half 12, are you nearly ready?"
He asked her

"Yeah....I just need to do a test before we go"
She stood up making her way to the bathroom at the end of the hallway.

"You sure you want to do it before? Not wait until later?"
He asked her. The couple been trying for a baby for just over a year. The past few months had been extremely difficult though, each negative test from month eight onwards ending in tears from dianne. They were going through the process now of being referred to a fertility specialist but had been told to keep trying until they got through. He didn't want her to be upset just before they were going out because it would knocked her for the whole day, for a few days infact.

They were going to ottilies birthday party. She was 4 today and it was her first proper party with friends from her pre school class and a magic show, so they had promised her they would be there as she was taking it very seriously and was very excited.

"I wont beable to wait until later, it will annoy me all day if I don't know"
She told him

"You want me to come in with you?"
He asked her

"Can I do this one by myself?"
She asked

"Of course, I'll wait out here"
He said kissing her forehead before she closed the door between them. Joe waited outside, a regular occurrence. Sometimes he went in with her, sometimes we waited outside. It just depended on what she was feeling in that moment, he always did what she wanted him to do, to make her feel comfortable, especially since it got more difficult for them.

The bathroom door clicked from the lock turning a few minutes later, diannes red hair appearing from around the corner.

"You ok?"
He asked her. She couldnt speak, she just shook her head.

"Negative"
She whispred her voice breaking as she handed him the white stick, one very visible red line on it.

"Dont cry, come on, shhh, its ok"
He immediately wrapped his arms around her small frame, bringing her closer to his body. His hand rested on her lower back, his fingertips tracing shapes on her bare skin.

"I cant do this anymore"
She stuttered crying into his chest.

"You can, we can dot."
He told her

"No we cant"

"Of course we can. We just need to keep trying"
He said

"We've been trying for 14 months joe. It's not going to happen"
She said. For the whole process she had always had hope that one day it would happen. This was the first time she had said it wouldn't happen.

"Why isn't it going to happen? It's just taking us longer. It will happen one day"
He told her

"But what if we can have children? What happens then?"
She asked him

"I will literally do everything in my power to make it happen, I promise"
He said

"There could be something wrong with one of us..."

"And that's what ivf is for, that's what surrogacy is for, adoption. Theres so many options out there we can turn to if we need to"
He said

"But...."

"No buts, I promise it will happen. I'll make it happen"
He told her

"Ok.....I need to pull myself together now"
She wiped away her tears, pulling away from joe and taking a big deep breath.

"Are you sure you still want to go? You dont have to if you don't want to"
He told her

"No, I want to go. I promised ottie I'd be there"
She said

"But you're upset, I'm sure zoe would understand about why you dont want to go, shes been through this before"
He explained

"I dont want her to know.....and I want to see ottie, it's her first real party and shes really excited about it"
Dianne told him

"If you want to leave at any point though, we can come back home"
He assured her

"I think I'll be ok, I'll manage"
She said

"Ok, lets get ready to leave.....I love you"
He smiled weakly pressing his lips againts hers.

"I love you too"

~~~~~~~~

From the other side of the room, joe gazed over at dianne who stared out of the window into zoe and alfies garden at the many children sat on the grass watching the magic show that zoe had organised. He could tell exactly what she was thinking just from how far away she was stood. He could read her mind and how a million different things were going through it. There were loads of children infront of her, yet not one of them was their own. Each one of these children had parents that loved them and were glad they were there  but they could have a child of their own they could love and bring along to their cousins birthday.

"Hey....."
Joe sat down next to her on the sofa.

"Hey"
She replied back quietly.

"Do you want to go home?"
He asked her having noticing the mental pain she was going through in that moment

"I'm fine"
She whispred

"Sure?"
He raised his hand stroking her hair.

"Yeah.....I just. Its bitter sweet. Theres so many children here and ottie is so happy, but yet none of them kids are ours. It's just sad"
She told him

"I know...how are you feeling?"
He asked softly

"Bottled up, if I'm honest."
She said

"Why? She speak to me"
He shuffled closer towards her, so she could lean into his side.

"Just being around children....its difficult. And I know children are literally an everyday thing, they're people but it's just sad and I'm wishing one of them were ours"
She explained

"We'll get there eventually though. No matter how long it takes"
He assured her

"I just feel really left out. Both my brothers have children, all my cousins have children, zoe and alfie and all your cousins have kids. Even poppy and sean have one on the way now. Were the only people in our families who it hasn't happened yet and it's scary"
She told him

"What are you scared about?"

"If theres something wrong. It would confuse me because nobdoy else in our family has had trouble conceiving, so if theres a problem with one of us, it just wouldn't make sense. And I'm starting to beleive there is something wrong....it could be something to do with my eating disorder when I was younger, I dont know"
She told him

"That's why we've been referred to a specialist"
They first noticed there could be an issue after they had been trying for 9 months. Even though it's not recommended to get tests done until you've been trying for over a year, joe and dianne were very proactive about it because of diannes age. She wasnt getting any younger and once she hit the 40 mark which was in just under 4 years, it would be harder for anything to happen and they wanted to have more than one child.

"I know but it's taking ages. As the days go on, the less good I feel about the whole situation"
She told him

"I know...but we've got to keep going, havent we?"
He said

"Yeah, I suppose so"
She said quietly

"We'll be ok"
He told her, a small smile crept on her face as she buried her head into Joe's chest, her eyes turning back to the garden where all the children was sat just knowing that one day they would be doing this, looking out at their own child, whenever that would be.....