Losing Hope *EDITING*

Chapter 22; Claire Curvel

I sat quietly in the back of the car. Carl's head was leaned on my shoulder as he snored slightly while he slept. I don't know how the stench of walker blood on me didn't make him want to move away from me. The shoulder he was laying on was even covered in dried blood. I was beyond filthy, but so was Rick. He had blood painting most of his body too so I guess that's why Hershel and Carl didn't really mind me.

Me on the other hand. I couldn't stand the smell or sight of the blood covering most of my body. It reminded me too much of last night and what I was trying to forget. I lost myself after finding Randall and I'm lucky enough that I found enough will in me to pull back to humanity. It wasn't even me. It was the thought of Glenn. When I thought about him last night, I got that little speck of hope I was losing back. That little bit of hope I needed to keep surviving in this world.

My head rested against the cold window as we drove down the road. The blue eyes that stared back at me in the reflection of the window were wide open with worry. I was worried about the other members of our group. I had no idea if they made it out safe and sound. I don't even know if we're in the clearing yet. Rick was just driving, but I didn't want to ask him where. He didn't need another worry on his hands anyway.

I moved my head off the window, looking up at Rick as he stopped the car, getting out. I shook Carl gently, his eyes fluttering open to look at me. I pointed outside to his dad and he nodded. "You coming?" He asked groggily.

"Yeah," I mumbled. "You don't have to worry Carl. It's over now and I won't let anything get you."

"Thanks Claire." Carl gave me a small smile before leaning over me and opening the door.

I smiled a little, getting out and holding my hand out to Carl. He grabbed it, shutting the door behind him. I pulled him along with me to his dad, letting his hand go so he could go look around with him. Hershel walked over to them, leaving me be. I turned around, heading back to the car and leaning against it with my arms folded across my chest.

Carl came storming over a few minutes later, leaning against a station wagon. I didn't say anything to him, just reached over and tilted his hat up a little. I gave him a small smile of reassurance as he looked up at me with tears in his eyes. It was quiet between us. I'm sure we both had a lot on our minds. Carl was worried sick about his mother, I could tell.

"Claire..." Carl whispered. "Do you think they're all still alive?"

He looked up at me with fearful eyes. I sighed, walking over to Carl and pulling him into a hug. "Yes. I put all my faith in it," I told him.

"Walker, walker," Rick whispered sharply.

I wrapped my arm tightly around Carl's shoulder, pulling him with me to the other side of the car as Rick and Hershel rushed over. We stayed as quiet as we could, Carl's face buried in my bloody t-shirt as he shook. Rick had his gun raised as we watched the walker slowly drag its way past the side of the car.

"Okay. Come, come, come, come."

We followed closely behind Rick to the back of the car. I sighed in relief, letting Carl go so he could see that the walker was gone. I took a couple deep breathes, shaking my head slightly. Great. The fear of walkers is back.

"I don't know how much longer we can stay here," Hershel warned.

"I'm-- I'm not leaving without mom," Carl protested.

Rick leaned over to whisper to Hershel. "So we're just gonna walk away?" Rick asked. "Not knowing if my wife, your girls, are still out there? How do we live with that?"

"We've only got once concern now-- just one-- keeping these two alive."

I shook my head. "Hershel I agree with you, but we can't just leave. The others might seriously show up," I pointed out. "Just have a little faith in it."