Losing Hope *EDITING*

Chapter 16; Claire Curvel

I sat on the windowsill in Beth's room quietly. My knees were pulled to my chest as I gazed out the window at the barn. It's silent in the room. Beth not wanting to say anything, neither did I. We both knew Maggie and Lori were still outside the room even if the door was closed. Beth wants to kill herself and I fainted from shock so Maggie and Lori are on edge. Hell everyone seems to be worried about us; not that I blame them.

I understand how Beth is feeling now. I don't know if Randall is even still alive. Without him, what's left to keep surviving for? There's obviously no cure. There's hardly any people walking around that ain't dead.

There was a knock on the door as someone walked into the room. There was whispering by the door before it was shut, and the lock clicked.

"Aren't you gonna say something?" Beth's soft voice asked.

I turned my head to notice Andrea was in the room, looking between Beth and I. I scowled, turning back to stare out the window. I didn't need a babysitter. I'm pretty sure Beth didn't either. My gaze followed Andrea as she walked over to Beth's bathroom and opened the door.

"Is this what you want?" Andrea asked, staring at Beth seriously. "Is this what you want Claire?"

I stared at her blankly, rolling my eyes and standing up. I walked to the door -my feet dragging along as I unlocked the door and walked down the hall to the bathroom. I closed the door behind me, not bothering to lock it as I dropped to my knees. My lip trembled as I bit down on it, desperately trying to hold back my tears. I wrapped my arms around my small waist as quiet sobs rack my body, my chest heaving as I struggled to control my breathing. I let myself fall onto my side and curl up into a ball. Everything just feels so wrong. I feel so alone even with all these people around me. I pressed my left hand to my mouth, ignoring the pain in my wrist as I tried my best to muffle my cries.

I laid there on the bathroom tile, a hand gripping on tightly to the knot on my blouse. It wasn't even about Randall anymore. I just didn't want to be here anymore. Not in this world, not this way. I'm weak. I can't even go outside of the house without having someone babysit me. I know what they're all thinking. I know what they all feel. They just see me as one of them things. They don't think I'll make it and I don't think I will either...

There was a rapid knock on the door. "Claire? Claire are you in there?" a voice called out worriedly.

"Leave me alone," I choked out. I was quick to sit up and click the lock as the door knob twisted. "Just leave me alone..." I sobbed out quietly. I pressed my back against the wall, ignoring the pleas from the person on the other side of the door. I squeezed my eyes shut as tears still ran down my face, placing my hands over my ears to ignore the frantic banging on the door.

~~~

I slowly opened my eyes, goosebumps instantly rising on my skin as a cold breeze hit my shoulders. I blinked a couple of times, sitting up in confusion. I looked around, noticing I was in someone's tent. I immediately recognized the baseball cap sitting on the small table; letting me know I was in Glenn's tent. I rubbed my eyes tiredly -crawling out from his sleeping bag cot and out of his tent. How did I get out here? I could have swore I feel asleep in the bathroom yesterday. I yawned, stretching my arms above my head as I noticed the sky was gray. I slept the whole day away yesterday?

"You're finally awake sunshine." I turned as Shane stalked over to me, his button up shirt wide open. "Heard you were feeling a little down yesterday. You okay kid?"

"Where's Glenn?" I asked -not wanting to answer his question. He was one of the two people who took Randall away yesterday. Plus I just don't trust him. He scares me.