Allegro con fuoco

XVII

He would have pushed the hands of the clock forward, if he could. Even though he knew he should enjoy this, their last night here, the last buffet dinner with the orchestra, and in a minute the last concert, his mind kept floating off to what would happen after. 
Well. At least this, too, seemed to be a good way to thwart performance anxiety, because had he ever been this relaxed before a concert? In fact, he had chatted to Anna and Trevor, who was clearly still feeling guilty for how he had acted and now being one of the nicest guys you could ever imagine, to the other flute, to a couple of the cellos. I mean, who knew? Maybe one day he would become socially adept? 
Stranger things had happened, surely? 
So now they found themselves back in the wings. It was only them, and Todd and Ian where by the stage doors, Todd's arm around Ian's back, whispering things in his ear. Eddy almost laughed. God, where they this sticky too, when no one was watching them? Ian was clearly loving what Todd was saying as well, because he was getting some colour on his cheeks. 

The applause came then, and Todd let Ian go and picked up his cello, which had been lying on its side by the wall. 
"So. One more time, lads. Have fun!" he said. 
"You too, Todd. We'll rock it."
He counted the steps as he walked towards the first chair. After his talk with Brett, it seemed all his worries had fallen away. In fact, he felt strong, stronger even than before. Ten paces, fifteen, eighteen, and he was there. He looked around the auditorium at the sea of faces. Some young, quite a few grey. As always. He nodded at John, who was walking to the other side, giving them the space. Then he sat down and took a deep breath. 
Drink it in. Feel it. Remember it. 
Another smile, another nod. Another A, another deep breath in to cue. 

Oh, he did love this quartet. The beautiful viola line, that then came back in his own part. The hauntingly beautiful slow movement. The happiness of the last movement. He loved it all. And had he ever been more in it, than now, here, with his friends, and his love? He would have made the piece longer, played it again, anything to prolong this moment. 
This. This, right here. This was why he wanted to do this the rest of his life. With Brett, preferably. The closing chord came, of course, as it does, and the audience erupted into applause. The foursome got up and bowed, and before he knew it they were back to the side of the stage. 

"That was fucking awesome." Todd said. "I don't think we ever played it better. And you, Eddy! You were on fire, man. Way to lead."
He could feel his cheeks colouring at the compliment, but he wasn't about to turn it down. 
"You all were great. Ian! I loved your lines so much!"
"Thanks, Eddy."
They walked back to the dressing room, laughing, bantering, free. Happy. And then, once the concert was over, they mingled with the orchestra. And for once Eddy wasn't worried, wasn't anxious. He was where he should be. 
It was past midnight by the time they walked out of the music school and towards the hotel for the last time. Tomorrow at seven they needed to be up to catch the long flight back home. 
"So, beauty sleep?" Todd said in his joking tone. And normally Eddy would say yes, I'm beat. But something was different about this evening. So he smirked at Todd, and sent a look that he hoped was scorching to Brett. 
"Hm. Don't know. We've got all day tomorrow to sleep, right?"
He could see Brett's reaction clear as day, even as Todd started to laugh. 

Good. Because he had made Brett a promise, earlier, and he intended to fulfill that to the fullest extent.