Allegro con fuoco

LIII

He let himself fall down on the light blue chair in the corner of the room, not caring right now that he was sweaty and gross both from the flight and the long jog that followed. 
"God, Brett, I'm sorry." he started. "I'm so sorry I worried you. I shouldn't have gone so far. And I should have taken my phone so I could call you."
"Eddy."
Brett's soft, husky tone was a warning and Eddy's mouth closed of its own accord, the next apology dissolving into nothing. Then he nodded. What was there to say now, to do now? Nothing but honesty would be even remotely acceptable after he had just made him worry. Even if it would make him look stupid. 
"Adorable." he whispered then. 
"Huh?"
Brett put his hand on Eddy's thigh, crouching down in front of him, looking up at him with a mix of worry and surprise. 
"Yeah. Adorable. It's what I am, apparently. I've heard it too often. Not sexy, not strong, not fierce or tough. No. Adorable."
Brett sat down on the floor with an audible plop. 
"That's what's been bothering you?"
Eddy shrugged harshly. 
"That. And I'm jealous, even though I know full well how fucking stupid that is. I know how fucking stupid all of this is, Brett, that's why I went for the fucking run in the first place. I shouldn't fucking well need you to sort out my fucking adorable head!"
His voice had crescendoed all the way from pianissimo to forte and to be honest he expected Brett to be annoyed, or quiet. Or taken aback, upset, but instead he just nodded and smiled vaguely. 
"Eddy mine." he said then, his hand warm on Eddy's thigh. "Please hear me out here, okay? Yes, you are adorable. That is not a bad thing though, it's a great thing. You heard what I said about that earlier, I hope. You are also fierce, and fucking sexy. Come on, you must know I feel that. I've certainly shown you that often enough, haven't I? We've been together for years and I still can't get enough of you. And you are strong, so strong in fact. You're much stronger than I am."
Brett looked down at his knees and took a breath that seemed to come all the way from underneath his toes. Then he nodded gently and looked up at him again.
"Don't you know... Eddy, don't you know that I would be lost?" His gentle voice was but a whisper now, his sincerity shining bright, his deep brown eyes open and bare.
"I would be completely lost without you." he breathed as he gently took Eddy's hand. 

Eddy sat in complete silence for the longest moment, staring at him, trying to grasp what he had just heard. The soft, bare words punched him in the gut, in the chest, leaving him raw, leaving him whole. 
"Lost?" he whispered when his voice would work once more.
Brett nodded again. 
"Completely. I can deal with the world with you, Eddy. So please don't ever fucking think I would even so much look at Todd, or anyone else for that matter, that way. Ever."
"Bretty..."  Eddy whispered, overcome, the tears welling up in his eyes at Brett's naked honesty. Honesty he knew he was only showing to help him, to make him feel better. 
He had had no idea Brett felt that way. He had had no idea he meant that to him. And he knew what it would be taking for Brett to open up like this, to bare his soul for him to see. His heart spilled over with love for him as his eyes spilled over with hot tears. 
"I'm so sorry." he whispered as he moved in one motion. 
Yes, he was disgusting and sweaty but right now he couldn't find it in him to care. He just knocked Brett to the floor, straddled him and kissed him, hard. 
It only took a millisecond for Brett to grunt and return the kiss, just as hard.