Colton's Miracle ✔️

15. Pieces Of The Truth

Lily:

After our confession, Colton decides to hug the life out of me for five whole minutes, and when I declare that my feet are falling asleep he solves that problem by sitting down on the dark grey couch in his office and placing me on his lap.

He's fiddling with my hair that he seems obsessed with while I absently play with the collar of his shirt, straightening it for no obvious reason.

"Can I ask you something?" Colton grabs my attention and I nod at him. "Why do you have a necklace with your name on it?"

My hands freeze and I'm suddenly stiff as a board, because I didn't expect that. Because I don't know how to answer that.

When I first came here, I didn't want a single soul to know of my past, of the crimes that still haunt me in my nightmares. I still don't. But lying to Colton is not an option. I refuse to start whatever it is that we're going to have based on lies.

One day, I would have to tell him everything. My darkest secrets that I wanted to pretend weren't there would have to come to the light sooner or later. Only I hope by then that he would've given me the chance to show him the real me before he decides to run for the hills like he probably should. I'm so selfish to want to keep the image of this Lily in his eyes, never tainting it. But if we build a connection now, formed on lies, then I know it'll crumble to ash soon. And I never want that.

"Who's Anne, Lily?" Colton asks, already figuring half of my answer out.

Swallowing the bitter lump in my throat, I tell him. "My sister."

Colton remains silent, and I don't know if it's because he can figure out more than he tells by just looking into my eyes, or because he wants me to elaborate.

But I do anyway. "Vivian was her name. Everyone called her Anne, though. I used to be Lily back home, but that was a very long time ago."

Somehow, Colton already knew that I am Lily, not Anne. Even though I tried to be Anne, he still saw right through me. Anne didn't fit me, he said. He was right. I'm not Anne, not really.

"Can I ask what happened to her?" His voice is smooth, soft, as if he's trying to assure me that he'll soothe my pain away if I decide to tell him. It's not pain that I'm struggling with. It's a deadly amount of guilt that he couldn't even begin to fathom.

"She died six years ago, that's the shorter version of the story." I say quietly, sadly, regretfully. "One day, I'll tell you the longer one. I promise you that. But not now, not yet."

Colton nods his head at me, his eyes softening, and I'm sure the relief is evident on my face.

I offer him another piece of the truth. "She was in high school when she died, senior year. I wanted everyone to call me Anne because I wanted her to be here with me, in some way living the life she never got to."

I don't tell him that it was all my fault.

"Do you want me to call you Anne?" He asks patiently and I quickly shake my head.

"No. Not you." I say with a pained expression on my face. With Colton I get to be Lily, not Anne. Maybe not the same Lily I was back home, thank goodness for that, but still Lily. To him, I've always been Lily, and I want to keep it that way. I only hope that when the time comes and he learns who Lily truly is, he would still stick around. I wouldn't blame him if he didn't, I never could.

"I'm sorry for your loss, Lily." Colton whispers in my hair, pulling me closer against his chest and I quietly thank him. I'm sorry too.

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