When reality changes

21

"come on" I said pulling rooks hand, we walked to a store and I got a bubble machine for Isa, cas and Ashton and we got a drink to share as I went to pay rook did "why?" I asked him as we walked out "because, I wanted to" he said "your too good" I said holding his hand.

"who wants hot dogs?!" Base yelled "me" casie yelled running to base "thank you again for letting us stay here" kells said to Lillian "no problem you guys are practically family" she said. Tomorrow is fins funaral and it's gunna hurt.

When we got to his funaral I was trying to hold it together "cam" my mom said huggeing me, I was never close to her but she's still my mom. Then my grandma came over too "you've grown so much" grandma said and I just nodded, cause as soon as I talk I'm crying. "Cam" my cousin said huggeing me and I hugged her back. When the funeral started I started crying, then Lillian went up to talk and I held isa, she was crying and it broke me, she dosent deserve to lose her dad so young, she won't even remember him, it's tuff growing up without a dad. I rubbed Isa back as Lillian talked about fin "he was the best husband and father, he didn't deserve this, he was truely an amazing man, he gave his dream job up because he loved his daughter, he was selfless and someone selfish had to take him from us" Lillian said and she sat back down takeing isa

When I got up to talk I already had so many tears running down my face "we all knew him as a relitve, he was my brother and my best friend, he was there for all my first but I had to be there for his lasts. I wish rolls where reversed because I'd much rather it be me in a casket then him, and if I ever find that son of a bitch who killed him it won't be pretty, I'll never forget you fin" I said.

That day was a vary bad day for me but the next day wasn't much better, I spent all day wanting to cry. But the day after that was better cause I was distracted "auntie" Ashton said huggeing my leg and Isa hugged the other leg then cas jumped on my back "help I'm being malled by kids" I said laughing

When I got on stage I felt free "can you all just put your phones down for this song and lissin?" I said and they yelled "you won't know this song cause it's not out yet and Ash might yell at me but here we go" I said and I sat down and lit a blunt, this song dosent have any music in the back it's just voice,

"I know your there just if you where here, next to me, I was your fallen angel, but now your an angel and I can't see you, that girl calls you dad, but now she can't see dad, the skills you showed me, the things you taught me, the things we hid, ha weed," I sung then kells came out and sat next to me "my brother, gone? How? Why? When? Oh then, it's scary how, I never wanted to hear that, but because if some dude I did, goodbye my brother, your in my thoughts and hart" kells sung and he stayed next to me then everyone elce came and sat next to us "sence day 1, I had you next to me now I'm on day 8948.625 and your not here it's just me still running running faster than ever to prove that I can but without you can I? I don't think I can" I sung and Isa sat in my lap "you can make it c, we got you, we will protect you like a body guard, we'll be the sholder to cry on, the pillow to hug, the wall to punch, anything you need, we are here" kells sung "29 years and gone, 29 years never lied, not to me, not to his little sister, no wasn't in his vocabulary I'm sure it was when that gun was pointed at him, it's sertenly in mine when that guys family is saying he's misunderstood I don't care, he took my brother, my light in life" I sung "goodbye my brother your in my thoughts and hart" kells sung "fuck you Andy brewmen!" Me and kells said at the same time

When I got off stage I layed on the ground "that was beautiful" Dre said sitting next to me "it was" meg said and I just layed there breathing like I ran a mile "here" ash said handing me a water and I chuged it all, "he's not coming back" I sighed, sitting up "no he's not but he loves you" Dre said rubbing my back "yah, he's in your hart" jas said and I nodded

When they got done with their set I hugged rook and he kissed my cheek

After tour I was always with rook and them "we should get a house together" rook said "what?" I asked "yah and we can start a family" he said "I love you" I said kissing him "actually" he said "where though?" I asked "I don't know, LA, Cleveland, Toledo, I really don't know" he said "I say LA because the guys" I said "yah" he said and I grabbed my laptop "so we are moveing?" He asked "if you want to" I said "this was easyer that I thought it would be" he said "what can I say I love you" I said and he smiled.