"Everything changes"L.Brooks <3

Sequel,part 3.

 It seemed like this month passed by so quickly.It was scary how time passed by so fast.Especially now,that I had less time to make my final desition.Well,I kinda HAD to go back to Australia now.James is pretty excited to go,he even got two weeks off off just so he could travel with me.

 I didn't think about going back to Australia,let alone move back there.So if,if I choose to stay in Australia,James says we would move there and he'd quit his job,and find a newer one there.I had no clue what to think about when he said that.I never thought about moving in with James.I guess I just wasn't ready.

 But of course I hadn't talked to him about it.Kinda just nodded and smiled when we'd talk about the subject because it was a weird awkward topic for me.There was now a week left until the flight to Australia.And then it was five whole months there,no buts.I was stressing out over it.

 There was so many things going around my head.I was signed to the contract so I couldn't back out on the job.I could back out,but I really don't want to.I love my job,I love what I do,so I wouldn't just give up on that for this.Plus the job did sound like an amazing opportunity,I couldn't just pass it up?I had to leave my home to live in Australia for five months.Basically almost half a year.I didn't know if I could handle seeing the guys again.

 But at the same time,My brain was telling me that the five months would be worth it.I was obviously excited to see my dad again.I missed him so much.Also seeing my old family again excited me more.Also my girls.Gosh I missed them like hell.All of them.But I just didn't want to get hurt anymore.What if I saw Luke again?I couldn't bare look at him with Amanda.Yes it still hurt.I know I don't have feelings for him anymore.But what If I start getting them again?I guess I was just too afraid to get hurt once more.

—-

 "You excited?"James asked me pulling outside my small apartment.I shrugged with a sigh.Half because I didn't know what to say and half because of how full I was from the dinner we just ate."Come on babe.Don't tell me you're not excited to see your dad and family again?"He tells me.

 "Besides,you can't back out now that I asked my boss to give me two weeks to go and travel with you".I hit his arm and he laughs."I really am excited.I honestly am"I say.Because I really was."Good"He smiles."I'll still love you even if you don't want to go.I just don't want you to feel like i'm pressuring you to go".

 "You're not"I smiled at him.I kissed him goodbye and climbed out of his car.He drove off as I entered the building.I went up the elevator and minutes late I was in my apartment.I was tired even if it was only 10:30pm.I went straight to my room and took off my dress,make up,and put on sweats and a tank top.

 I tied my hair in a knot and jumped on the bed after turning off the lights.I grabbed the control turning on the T.V.I flipped through the channel bluntly not even paying attention to what I was doing.All I was thinking about was today.

 Because today,Sunday,was the last day,that if I choose not to go and travel to Australia,I'd have to tell Miss Kate by today.Or else i'd be now forced to go since there wasn't any time left to rearrange the agenda.And looking at the clock now about to be 11:00 at night,I had run out of time.

 It was too late to back out now.How I wished I didn't procrastinate about this and actually thought about it this whole day.I quickly grabbed my phone and dialed Miss Kate's number.It rang a few times but then she answered to my surprise.

"Hello?"Her voice says through the phone.I froze not knowing what to say.

My heart was telling me to go,

but my brain told me to not go..

-

The next day I went to the studio.It was about to be 11:00 in the morning when arrived.I opened the door greeting Grace sitting behind her desk.She smiled back and waved at me.I walked down the hall doing my routine and finally made it to Miss Kate's office.

 She commanded me to come in and I walked over sitting down on the chair in front of her."Hey Savana"She smiled."What was that about yesterday?"She frowns.

 "Oh uh nothing"I tell her."It was a false alarm.I'm sorry I called so late"I apologize."Next time,wait until you think everyones awake"She says making me lightly giggle.

***

We talked for about an hour and a half.The whole conversation was about the house in Australia,and moving there.No,not moving there,because I wasn't moving there,technically.I was trying to think of it as an extra long vacation.But she had basically had given me the keys to the house a while ago.and she explained everything out to me.She would call me the day after I landed.

And she'd make sure I was okay and all that.She explained that the house was already filled with furniture and stuff.I just needed to buy my essentials,like toothbrush,hairbrush,soap,etc.But other than that I was good to go.

She even arranged for me to rent a new car just while I was there.Now I was super excited.She gave me the directions to the studio where I would be working at for the five months.She was just so happy for me,she even told me that a few times.I was happy I was taking this opportunity.I guess I had to risk many things,but right deep inside I felt like it was worth it.

***

Today was Thursday.A day before we leave.Wow the nerves were getting to me.I had everything packed up and so did James.He even brought his suitcase over,and leaving it here so we could leave together form here.He would come over to my apartment in the morning anyways so why not leave it here."

You better go if you're going to wake up early,and come here"I say standing up turning off the T.V.I then feel him hug me from behind."I don't have to leave"He whispered in my ear before planting a wet kiss on my neck.

I tensed up a bit at his touch.

"J-james,you should go"I stuttered turning to face him."Come on.Just tonight.I'm coming over tomorrow anyway,why not wake up laying next to you?"He smirks placing his hands on my hips and surprising me with a kiss.

"James,please.I'm tired"I lied losing his grip.I walk into my room.This was the second time he's attempted to do this.And it kinda scared me a bit.Because I didn't want to.Yes,we've been dating for a year now.But I've never had sex with James.

Not once.And I didn't want today to be the first."Jessi.Why can't I touch you?Why can't we be like normal couples"He followed me to my room.I sighed sitting on my bed.

"You don't want to be with me anymore?Is that it?"He asks me."James thats not it"I sighed."Then what is it Jessi?Because it sure seems like thats the reason"His voice sounded more mad.

"I'm tired"I lied speaking up."Bullshit"He mumbled at me."Fine,yes thats a lie.But you promised you'd wait James.That you'd be patient"."I have been patient Jessi.For a year"He frustrated.

"I know"I sighed."Im sorry,but just bare with me.I'll try.But..just not right now"I muttered.His eyes softened and he sighed."I promise id wait.And I'm sorry for acting like this.Im just tired of waiting.But I'll wait for you"He smiled.I lightly smiled back at him and kissed him on the lips,My lips barely touching his.

But he smiled walking off,probably feeling bad from screaming earlier.I turned off the lights and laid in bed.I tried focusing on the job,But then every thought would get interrupted by a different thought.Mostly about seeing the guys again.

I wondered if I was making a mistake.