fixing feelings - vance hopper

chapter 9

you want to move in with vance but you cant stop thinking about your mom. will she even be able to live without you? you're the reason why the house is even semi clean but why should you care? she doesn't even appreciate you. you thought to yourself as you were sitting in front of vance working up the courage to ask him if you could move in with him until you get your own place.

"y/n? are you okay? you've just been zoned out for a couple of minutes" vance says putting his hands on yours as they fidget nervously.
"vance?" you take a deep breath then
"i was wondering if i could move in with you. i know it kind of seems sudden and i understand if you dont want me too i mean its just another mouth to feed am i right? i just assumed it wouldn't be an issue because your dad isn't home a lot my mom doesn't give a shi-" you ramble on "woah hey y/n. of course you can i mean i dont see why not. i'd rather you be here anyway" he says.
"of course i knew it was a bad idea i'm sorry i shouldn't have ask- wait... you said yes oh my god you said yes" you jump up and down and go across the table to where he was sitting and wrap your arms around his neck.

"when should we get your things? today? tomorrow?" he mumbles as his head is on your chest while hugging. "i just want to get it over with already so do you mind if we do it today?" you ask quietly.
"i dont mind darling what ever you want to do is fine with me. come on lets go head down there. i'll grab a wagon or something from my garage"

you nod and slip your shoes on that are sitting near the door then wait for vance outside.

you and him walk to the house and you walk inside slowly and see your mom on the couch sleeping again with alcohol bottles around her.

you walk slowly into your room and instead of walking in and out you just hand everything to him from outside the window worried to wake up your mom. after about an hour you walk out and lock the door. then the emotions kick in.
you're moving out of the house you've lived in for years no matter how many bad memories you've had there you can only remember the good ones right now. you're now crying and vance sets down the last box that you've given him of your things in the wagon and walks over to you slowly.

he hovers over you and hugs you softly whispering nice things into your ear.
"its okay i know this must be hard for you"
"we'll have so much fun together all the time like going on ice cream dates and record shopping."
"you're so beautiful"
"y/n you deserve so much better"
"once we get home you can lay down on the couch and i'll take care of your things for you"
you sniffle and look up at vance and thank him.

he grabs your hand and you guys head back towards the house.

vance pov:
we walk in and y/n walks over to the couch and lays down. i grab the blanket we had yesterday and place it over her then place a kiss on her forehead and sigh, then go back to the boxes of her things.

i hope everything goes smoothly with her moving in. we're going to have to go to school at some point though it's going to get boring staying at home all the time and my dad is going to make me anyway not that i have an option.

i take care of her things as i separate my clothes into different drawers so i can fit her clothes in.
she had some makeup so i just put that on my bedside table in a little container so it would all stay together.

i'm nervous for school because theres a whole bunch of assholes there and the boy who always fucks with me goes there.

she's gonna meet my friend robin, hopefully they get along. me and robin have been friends since we were babies and he was the only one who understood how i felt with my anger issues but he's caring unlike how i was before i met y/n.

many people dont mess with me at school though because they've seen the messy fights i've been in and that tends to scare people but people will always continue to talk shit and thats what starts it.

i look around my room proud of myself for cleaning up the room after taking care of everything and taking care of the wagon back in the garage.
i walk back out of my room and look at y/n who is sleeping. today must've been quite stressful for her right after we gathered all of her things. i hope she'll be happy here with me because i know that i'll be happier by her being here.
i care about her so much already and i need her to be safe no matter what.

i sit on the couch with my elbows on my knees and turn the news on just to get an update on random rumors i've been hearing about this "kidnapper".

"Bruce Yamada" has been missing since July 18th and still hasn't been found. black balloons have been found every time these kids have been going missing."

i sigh and turn off the tv. this shit is the only thing that gets me the most nervous like fuck him who the hell is doing this and why. like imagine if this shit happened to y/n. i'd never recover.

bruce was such a good kid and amazing at baseball. me and him never talked but all i can remember is he was very smart and was always in a good mood. i would glare at him in the hallways from time to time or just see him riding his bike outside past my house.

these thoughts are going through my brain as i fidget with my hands nervously but i take a deep breath and try to always think positive like he always seemed to do.

i look back at y/n still sleeping and pull the blanket up a little so its fully covering her and move her hair out of her face to kiss her forehead then step outside.

i pull out a pack of cigarettes out of my jean pocket and pull one out . i haven't smoked in a while but i feel like i need to right now. i always believed that smoking helped my anxiety but to be honest it wouldn't. it would only help me forget about what i was thinking before that was making me want to smoke. i hold the cigarette in between my fingers and sit on the porch steps and watch as a black van drives past me quickly and i get a shiver of a bad feeling.

was that? no it couldn't be.