Behind the Mask

Rant: Dentention

Judging from the title, you can guess what I am mad about.

English, 1st Period.

The teacher was talking about the stupid SBAC testing. She went on and on about how we had to work harder, to recevie high scores. She stated that whomever recieved a bad grade on the Motivations Essay was not going to score well on the test.

I was bored to death. I think I have ADHD or OCD or something, because I couldn't sit down any longer. My mind was wondering.

On the whiteboard, near my seat, someone had drawn a girl's head, without her eyes. I didn't know what I was thinking, but I picked up a marker and filled in the face with two slinted eyes and a mouth. Bad decision.

Almost 20 kids looked in my direction, and they started laughing. The teacher stopped, and stared at me, and crossed her arms.

At that time, I was like: "Oh shit. I just got in trouble." And, I started laughing. I have no freaking idea why I did that. I had no idea why I even picked up the marker. I couldn't stand the glare that teacher was giving me. I was dead.

I got called out of the classroom, and the teacher continued talking about homework and other shit. I had no idea what I had just did. I f***ing screwed up. I stood against the wall, thinking of what type of emotion I should be giving.

Was I sad, teary? Or was I still supposed to be laughing? I had no f***ing idea.

That 5 minutes were the longest in my life. I raced my mind of how to respond to her questions. What WAS I thinking? Nothing. I wasn't even thinking. I could have blamed it on possible uncured OCD and ADHD.

When she came out, the teacher started saying that I was making fun of her. She said that the other students were looking at her and the picture, as if there was a connection.

WHAT THE F***!!!???

I was shocked. I didn't know if she even had eyes, because I CLEARLY drew Asian eyes on the faceless girl. Why in the world would I have thought to make fun of her?

I DON'T F***ING UNDERSTAND...

Of all people, why did she think that one of her most favorite students would humilated her? Up until now, I have no idea if she has any mental disabilities...

YOU KNOW WHAT? SCREW THE ASTERISK's. FUCK THEM. I DON'T HAVE THE TIME TO DEAL WITH THIS ANYMORE...

FUCKING BITCH. OF ALL THE PEOPLE.

After we went back into the classroom, she pulls out a Pink Slip. I sat at my desk, knowing what she was about to do. My friends comfort me, acknowledging that I didn't meant to do it purposely.

They understood how I felt. They could feel my rage. They could tell that I was about to explode.

After class, she hands me the slip of paper, a fake smile on her face. I felt like smacking her. I wanted to break something- the slip of paper on the top of the list. She refered to me an hour detention, the longest possible punishment on the list. She also mentioned a possible parent contact. Afterwards, Alan's arm hung around my neck. He tried to calm me. It didn't work.

WHAT DID I EVER DO TO HUMILITATE ANYBODY? WHY DOES EVERYONE HAVE TO ASSUME THAT THE FUNNY, OUTGOING PERSON HAS TO BE THE ONE THAT STARTS THE TROUBLE?

ALTHOUGH I REGRET MY STUPID DECISIONS, WHY CAN'T YOU THINK ABOUT YOURSELF? YOU CALL YOURSELF A DOCTORATE IN ENGLISH TEACHING? FUCK THAT.

WHAT KIND OF TEACHER ARE YOU?

How could you possibly blame me for being who I am?

Sure, I was distracting the class. I admit that.

But, you really didn't have to give me that much of a punishment. A WHOLE FUCKING HOUR!

HOW COULD A COUPLE DASHS ON A WHITEBOARD TURN INTO AN HOUR DETENTION?

FUCK, even 30 minutes could have been more reasonable. You got think:

AN HOUR DETENTION IS LONG AS FUCK. IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE FOR THE KIDS THAT SLEEP IN CLASS. THE ONES THAT DON'T EVER TURN IN THEIR HOMEWORK.

What am I supposed to say there?

"OH, I drew a face on the whiteboard while the teacher was talking?"

HOW DOES THAT SOUND? NOT VERY SERIOUS. How about this:

"Oh, I drew a penis on the whiteboard."

YEAH. BIG DIFFERENCE. AND TO THINK:

I AM SITTING IN A GROUP WITH THE 2.5 GPA STUDENTS.

FUCK. I'm not even sure if the teacher actually called or not. If she did...

JUST IMAGINE THIS, AND YOU'LL UNDERSTAND THE MOST IMPORTANT REASON WHY I WOULD BE EVEN MORE HURT AT HOME:

Most of time, I will get 90 minutes of kneeling, at least 50 consecutive spankings, and a speech about my actions and their consequences.

YEAH. Compare that to school detention. It's like another class, if you ask me. You get to do your fucking homework.

No. I actually get both.

To think that I was mere WEEKS from Summer Break. I was already so close. I though about how relieving it would be to not receive a detention in all of 7th Grade.

And shit happened...

MY MESSAGE TO EVERYONE:

Just fuck life. If your dreams are not within reach, don't go for it. You'll kill yourself.

Also, don't think that people are your friends. They could be thinking shit behind your back.

@TheNinjaReborn